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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Does My Boyfriend Have Asperger's?? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 18 Jun 2011, 9:50 pm
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Replies: 29
Views: 31,170
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| ::In his book The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome, Dr. Attwood says "Clinical and counseling experience suggests that there are three requisites for a successful relationship. The first is that both partners acknowledge the diagnosis. He states "The acceptance of the diagnosis for those with A... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Anyone else afraid of being "found out"? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2010, 2:29 am
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Replies: 53
Views: 10,818
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| It seems to me that nowadays the more the public is becoming aware about the existence of Asperger's Syndrome, the worse it's becoming for some of us to deal with the stigmas attached. For many people, "Aspergers" has become a catch-all for describing any kind of excessively-odd behavior. Its prett... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: social common sense filters |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2010, 2:22 am
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Replies: 16
Views: 4,986
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| The internet. I've seriously learned everything social I know from the internet-- just by observing different chats, forums, IM and participating gradually. Probably not the best advice however... I depend on looking up definitions of many things while doing so, particularly emotions. I wouldn't pa... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: How can I improve myself ? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2010, 2:20 am
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Replies: 5
Views: 1,798
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| A good way to improve is to listen to what other people are saying. If someone sees a behavior that they think is off-putting or will make your relationships with others difficult, listen to them instead of writing off what they have to say. Others can see things that you can't since they are lookin... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Filling awkward gaps in conversation? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2010, 2:19 am
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Replies: 6
Views: 3,257
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| I get this all the time. That's why I only really enjoy talking to chatty people who can keep the conversation going. As an NT who dated an Aspie, I remember how awkward our first dates were. I was extremely chatty, not because I wanted to be or was comfortable being that way, but because I felt th... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: How do you tell people you are Aspie? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 04 Oct 2010, 2:13 am
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Replies: 87
Views: 16,622
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| I don't generally tell anyone unless I feel they need to know; like my teachers or my boss. I can fake it well enough that most people don't even have a clue I'm different. When I do though, it's always carefully and as innocuously as possible. I never want to make it seem like it's a huge deal tha... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: I'm so tired of people telling me I have no empathy... |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 08 Sep 2010, 12:51 am
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Replies: 27
Views: 5,947
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| I have a different question, do the NT's really care about each other's every problem? Or do they just fake it? (and we tend not to do that) I can't speak for all NT's, but I am a feeler by nature and can't help but be filled with sympathy and empathy when something bad happens. I dated an ADD Aspi... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Anyone else afraid of being "found out"? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 08 Sep 2010, 12:39 am
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Replies: 53
Views: 10,818
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| It's really important that you don't allow yourself to become dishonest and/or in denial of your condition around people you do trust and truly care about. Hopefully, they will react well, either way it's better to know where they will stand and how they will feel about your true self now. I am an N... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: They Call Me Arrogant; Egoistical |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 08 Sep 2010, 12:34 am
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Replies: 21
Views: 5,571
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| Perhaps it's an issue of non-reciprocity. I am an NT and dated someone with inattentive ADD & Aspergers. I found him to be condescending and arrogant much of the time. What I mean by that specifically is that he, like myself, was college-educated and very knowledgeable about many areas. Only the... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: I Lie Alot - aspergers vs. dishonesty. |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 30 Aug 2010, 11:21 pm
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Replies: 71
Views: 25,825
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| Aspies can lie. I dated one who was dishonest many times, only he wasn't good at remembering details so in essence he was a pretty bad liar. I could catch him every time. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Are you capable of empathy? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 6:03 pm
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Replies: 77
Views: 7,293
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| I was with an NT man and he wasn't able to empathize. His reaction to seeing someone cry was to get angry and say that the person was "stupid". It was really hard for me. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: How do you tell someone you have AS? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 6:02 pm
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Replies: 18
Views: 2,356
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| I don't know what the best strategy for you would be, I guess it depends on your style and what you are comfortable with. But I will say, it's really important that you do find a way to tell people in your life, especially if you are dating someone. As someone who dated an NT, it would have been a l... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: aspie men and sexual misbehavior |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 5:58 pm
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Replies: 84
Views: 17,725
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| My former NT boyfriend was the opposite, he was very timid and reluctant about sex. Honestly, he didn't seem to prioritize it much which was disappointing. I think his meds decreased his sex drive. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Is it rare for a person with aspergers to be an INFP? |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 5:57 pm
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Replies: 74
Views: 23,690
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| INFP's love polls and social research. |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: very high functioning level hides serious difficulties |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 5:56 pm
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Replies: 53
Views: 6,190
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| Wow. I am not an NT but this reminds me a great deal of my ex-boyfriend who was. Ultimately, the relationship came to a close because he was not at a point in his life where he understood emotion at all or the experience of other people. He didn't realize that his disorder was a big problem or wasn'... |
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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: The autism social rule book. |
| Justifine |
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Posted: 27 Aug 2010, 5:48 pm
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Replies: 860
Views: 265,477
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| I am not an NT but I dated someone who had Aspergers and ADD. Things he didn't do that I wish he would have: 1) ASK about the other person. Conversations are reciprocal. If your non-NT partner or friend asks you a question, don't just endlessly talk about yourself and never return it. Say "how about... |
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