| Author |
Message |
Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Feeling angry and unforgiving towards my parents |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 30 Nov 2010, 5:38 pm
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Replies: 24
Views: 11,513
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| People are full of quirks, making life unfair. Even Gandhi rejected his unplanned son, who became an alcoholic. Anger is a signal to try to make a change, but it only works well in simple relationships. Unfortunately, the source of anger can easily overwhelm the higher faculties, but it is hard to s... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Am I doing more harm than good? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 30 Nov 2010, 8:49 am
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Replies: 5
Views: 1,142
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| In some ways, you are very good for each other; in other ways, you are mutually irritating. I'd recommend trying to make space in your lives to spend less, but better time together. You can join outside groups to pursue your interests and give him some time to re-collect his wits. His limitations ma... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Planning my first-ever vacation. Need help. |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 30 Nov 2010, 3:13 am
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Replies: 31
Views: 5,313
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| "Wherever I go, there I am." I don't think you will enjoy a vacation if you are not sure why you have put yourself into such an unfamiliar environment. Try a mini-vacation, such as turning up your thermostat, going out to watch a storm, and returning to a really warm place. There are probably many t... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Neurological origin of autism? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 29 Nov 2010, 10:25 pm
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Replies: 27
Views: 5,410
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| I'm just curious to see how many share this same background trait, as drug use and developmental disabilities seem to be easily connected.[/quote] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My parents were occasional social drinkers, with a limit of two. No "drugs" except for anaesthesia during delivery. My father and... |
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Forum: Work and finding a Job Topic: Finding and Keeping jobs - Tips and Advice |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 27 Nov 2010, 4:53 pm
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Replies: 235
Views: 390,782
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| Getting To The Point - Plus, Other Interviewing Tips By Ken Sundheim opednews.com Too many times, upon interviewing a job applicant, regardless of level, the individual does not get to the point upon being asked a particular question. They tend to oversell themselves and say or do other small things... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: Friendship Board - Age 19 Onwards |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 26 Nov 2010, 9:32 am
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Replies: 1,195
Views: 698,900
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| I just watched 6 hours of stuff about human happiness, and it usually comes from relationships. I never bonded with either parent, and have always turned out to be mistaken when I thought I was part of a circle of friends. The last time I moved, twenty people came to a going away party, but nobody r... |
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Forum: Social Skills and Making Friends Topic: I want to be your friend but I don't want to talk to you |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 26 Nov 2010, 9:09 am
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Replies: 4
Views: 1,072
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| Well, I remember a woman who had seen me around asking if I'd like to go for coffee. I don't drink coffee, so I just said "No thanks." It was years before I realized that coffee wasn't the main thing on her mind. My advice is to go, but as soon as you are uncomfortable, start explaining that you don... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Anyone else struggle with Therapists? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Nov 2010, 2:18 pm
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Replies: 33
Views: 6,038
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| My worst experience with therapy was at Prairie Haven in Saskatoon. It was supposed to be an all-inclusive deal, with unlimited visits to follow-up sessions in a support group with other "graduates." I should have quit cold when I was charged extra for an "Intake" interview, but they also lied. The ... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Death in family. What to do? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Nov 2010, 1:56 pm
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Replies: 13
Views: 2,563
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| Maybe the worst thing about funerals is that you are not allowed to laugh at the silly bits. So, how did it work out? |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Developing and Enforcing Routines |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Nov 2010, 1:52 pm
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Replies: 6
Views: 1,074
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| Could you make up a flexible schedule? Each morning, you could rate your energy level, and pick a more or less challenging version to match your ability to follow through. |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Advice about my father |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Nov 2010, 1:45 pm
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Replies: 3
Views: 918
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| Whenever someone gets an AS diagnosis, the drug companies loose, so it may not be easy to rescue a regular customer, even from the point of suicide, which is a definite risk with prescription meds. You may have to fight the system pretty hard. What saved me was the native cunning to change my behavi... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Living alone again after many years with others |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 25 Nov 2010, 1:36 pm
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Replies: 3
Views: 1,313
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| With the layoffs in education, you could probably volunteer your way into a school shop, if you are OK with high activity periods. A friend of mine was stuck with a yearly period when other classes were giving exams, and there was no time to start a new project in the shop. I came in to give a basic... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Relationship problems; help! |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 24 Nov 2010, 7:24 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 1,908
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| If you were trying to get me to open up, I'd suggest starting slow, and only raising one issue per session. I'd start with little issues that you don't care about, and reach a conclusion that makes life more comfortable for him. It may take a very long time for him to even identify his feelings enou... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Envy of my friends and their families during holidays |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 19 Nov 2010, 5:17 pm
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Replies: 4
Views: 1,171
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| I never bonded with my bio-family. The 1st time I felt like I was among similar souls was on a campus at Christmas - all the draft dodgers and others who didn't want to go home stayed and partied. I've made various attempts to find a substitute for family since, but always moved on. I'm pretty resig... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: I'm new |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 19 Nov 2010, 2:55 pm
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Replies: 12
Views: 1,407
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| I was quoting a book I read about cultures, eye contact, etc, rather than trying to suggest that eye behaviour was linked to race rather than a culture that is usually defined by race and location. And, I'm glad to hear that the demarcations are fading in general. I knew an engineer in Silicon Gulch... |
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Forum: In-Depth Adult Life Discussion Topic: Anyone Feel Immature for Their Age? |
| Dear_one |
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Posted: 19 Nov 2010, 11:38 am
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Replies: 99
Views: 49,828
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| I grew up all out of order. I was making machines from Meccano at 5, but took up blocks at 10. I had girlfriends at 4, 11, and 15-up. But I'm 62 now, and almost ready to write a short essay on the basic stuff I wish I'd known about in kindergarten, #1 being not to expect people to be logical. |
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