Is gravity a force or not?

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Not .

Gravity is normally thought of as a force.

Newton showed how Gravity could be thought of that way, and laid down the law, and the math, to do understand how gravity acts.

Three hundred years later Einstein showed how Gravity is really warps in space-time, and laid out the laws for relativity. Relativity evens out to being identical to Newton's laws in the world around us, but deviates from Newton in extreme cosmic situations.

But in our every day world of you and me, and even engineers, Newton works fine. So for practical purposes -yes-gravity is a force.

In my opinion gravity has to be a force as it is what shapes everything from planets and moons to nebulas and stars. The question that has always intrigued me is weather gravity is a push, pull or both. I tend to lean towards it’s a push. It’s a known fact that anything over 400sq miles gets pressed into a sphere. I’ve also had gravity explained to me as a force that doesn’t pull us to the ground but pushes us. This seams to contradict that you feel gravity’s force more on your feet than you do on your head.

Albert Einstein explained the phenomenon as a distortion of the fabric of reality itself; a view perhaps best summarized later by the physicist John Wheeler: "Spacetime tells matter how to move; matter tells spacetime how to curve".

A force?  Gravity is no more a "force" to matter than a garden hose is a "force" to water.