I'm sorry you were taught math in this way. It's sad because most career mathematicians focus on interesting areas of math such as universal algebra and logic and most of the way we learn is visually. It's sad that so many students are taught merely to memorize equations, plug and chug solutions and taught that is "math" and if they can't do that they can't do "math". These types of instructors are rarely good mathematicians themselves. Because that is farthest from what makes a good, abstract mathematician. A lot of the courses I took were taught in Mathematica with the descriptions and comments written out to explain the context. And then visual demonstration of the different types of problems. UIUC is my alma mater and even though they didn't have netmath setup when I went to school there, nor did they use mathematica as extensively in the coursework today (due to its headquarters there), I have found I enjoyed courses in grad school much more taught in that framework. So why not checkout the netmath website at UIUC? You can download mathematica, get college credit for a course, and learn the foundation in a more visual/hands-on framework. I'm thinking of doing it now just to go over a lot of concepts I had learned merely from books and have "forgotten" or avoided during the braindrain of daily life. Then if you like it you can move onto the more interesting topics in abstract areas which are almost entirely all visually focused. Then again, if you don't like it you don't like it and you can move onto something you perhaps like more or keep plugging at it until you can figure out how to approach it in a way you do. I personally love math when taught properly. Also it really helps your brain to feel alive and can be exciting and fun Hope this helps!

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