Best Guy Movies

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Top Gun — Fast planes, hot chicks and a guy named Maverick. After seeing this movie, you know you wanted to hop in an F-14 and blow away a mig.

BEST LINE: And if you screw up just this much, you'll be flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog <expletive deleted> out of Hong Kong!

The Godfather — The ultimate Mafia movie and a guide to how to be an honorable man. Every other mob movie wants to be this one.

BEST LINE: I'm gonna make him an offer he can't refuse.

The Big Lebowski— Admit it. You wish you were the Dude. You want to lounge around in your pajamas all day and bowl with your crazy friends at night. Don’t forget to stop at In-N-Out in North Hollywood for a burger.

BEST LINE: Look, let me explain something to you. I'm not Mr. Lebowski. You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. That or His Dudeness... Duder... or El Duderino, if, you know, you're not into the whole brevity thing.

The Last Boy Scout — Murderers, dancers, football, crooked politicians, Bruce Willis and Daymon Wayans. This film pretty much has it all.

BEST LINE: Bad guy: You think you are so <expletive deleted>cool, don't you? You think you are so <expletive deleted>cool. But just once, I would like to hear you scream in pain... Bruce: Play some rap music.

The Hangover — Bachelor parties will never be the same after this 2009 flick. It’s as true a guy movie, as you will ever see. Possibly the funniest one too.

BEST LINE: Remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That <expletive deleted>'ll come back with you.


Ocean's Eleven — Both versions are awesome, but I’m putting the Clooney re-make on the list. Robbing three Vegas casinos simultaneously is a great concept and you can’t go wrong with this cast.

BEST LINE: Ten oughta do it, don't you think? You think we need one more? You think we need one more. All right, we'll get one more.

Clerks — Shot in a convenience store, it’s a day full of hockey on the roof, movie talk and annoying customers. There are so many great lines; it’s hard to choose.

BEST LINE: "Empire" had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets.

Porky's — One of the original high school sex comedies and one that should be required watching for every guy about to graduate.

BEST LINE: This has gotta be the biggest beaver shoot in the history of Florida.

American Pie — A turn of the century version of Porky’s that taught us an alternative use for apple pie. All these guys wanted were to lose their virginity before college. Is that so wrong?

BEST LINE: I never did it with baked goods, but you know your uncle Mort, he pets the one-eyed snake 5-6 times a day.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off — If you grew up in the 80’s, this movie probably shaped the way you went to school. Ferris made calling in sick an art form.

BEST LINE: Oh, he's very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude.

Bad Boys (I & II) — Great action, funny dialogue and some nice looking ladies. This is how guys should hang out with their best friends!

BEST LINE: We ride together, we die together. Bad boys for life.

Superbad — Teenagers wanting to score with chicks is a popular theme, but when you have a character named McLovin, it has to be good. Right?

BEST LINE: You just -blocked McLovin!

Pulp Fiction — Quentin Tarentino’s classic tale of a boxer, gangster’s wife, two hitmen and diner bandits. It may not make sense at first, but it’s as good a movie as you will ever find. Pretty much anything with Samuel L. Jackson, Bruce Willis or John Travolta is good. Put them all in the same flick? Forget about it…

BEST LINE: I'm sorry; did I break your concentration? I didn't mean to do that. Please, continue, you were saying something about best intentions. What's the matter? Oh, you were finished! Well, allow me to retort. What does Marsellus Wallace look like?

Fight Club — After seeing this movie you wanted to go out and beat the snot out of someone. Anyone. You know you did.

BEST LINE: I want you to hit me as hard as you can.

The Big Lebowski - - I'd have to watch it again, dude. Been too long.

Ocean's Eleven - good flick, but seems a bit too tailored for the chick audience, despite overwhelmingly male cast

Full Metal Jacket - especially boot camp scenes

Heat - Gotta throw this one on here, even if the plot makes no sense, its about a half hour too long and Val Kilmer once again proves incapable of human expression. Its saving grace is a something like fifteen minute long gun fight that simply never gets boring. I've literally never seen anything quite like that one scene.

Have to add The Exependables to the list.

I think the list is right on with The Big Lebowski, Fight Club, and Clerks.
But I would add:
Sin City
The Matrix trilogy
300
I'm certain there are others.

-Bill, otherwise known as Kraichgauer