I haven't done much acting in the last decade (aside from a few homebrew music videos). Back in the day I would get the occasional bit part in a TV production, or commercials only seen in Japan, or dodgy student films.
A few courses picked up here and there along the way, I have minimal acting qualifications. Or so I thought, until my world flew apart last year, just before receiving my autism diagnosis.
The more I learnt about the condition, the more I started thinking... "I may not be anywhere near as good as a fully trained professional, but I've spent my whole life masquerading as a normal person." So I figured I'm qualified enough. I also have a passion for cinema, and have wasted a lot of time studying its details obsessively.
I subscribed to an online agency and created my profile. I actually use my autism as one of my selling points. "People are often surprised to discover that I am autistic..." Benefits include: mimicry, deadpan, portrayals from out of the uncanny valley etc.
There aren't many paying jobs for actors outside of a union. I should make that a priority if all goes well. In the meantime, there's a lot of dreck, unpaid roles, etc. Got a couple of roles that fell through because of project cancellations. Then I saw an ad for an unpaid drama being produced through a local community television station. I applied for an audition, and was given a script to rehearse. I tried to get a sense of my character from what little script I had, and practiced until it was smooth enough.
The audition itself was daunting. The weather was 40C that day and I had a flight to catch the next morning. I wondered if I was pushing my limits a little. I waited in a foyer with other hopefuls, we were all wilting from the heat and enjoying the aircon. I felt awkward but I think everyone else did too. Everyone was friendly all the same. Soon enough, it was my turn.
In an empty auditorium, I had to stand before a running video camera as well as a panel of three people. Their scrutiny of my performance was a little nerve racking. Being mindful of auditory processing issues, I had to really pay attention, and not take requests as criticisms. E.g. I was asked to do it again, only more sinister. "Ok! Sure thing..." I have a terrible feeling I gave exactly the same performance again. I was a little nervous which was ok. Actually I think it helped. The crew were all pretty nice anyway. I think they were surprised that I didn't read from the script itself.
A few weeks later, I received a group text (a lot of people auditioned) which said that if they haven't contacted me yet, they'd given the part to someone else. I think they gave the part to another guy I met in the audition foyer. He had the right presence for the role. I mean, if I was a casting agent, I would've picked him too.
I started thinking about how I should give up on crazy notions of acting and stick with my music and painting.
But then I got a text last night: we have a role for you tomorrow night, can you call us? So I called them back this morning. The assistant director: "Sorry, it's only a minor role, but a pivotal one. Do you want to play the murderer... " "Sure thing!" I said. A minor role to them is something significant to me. Most of my paid work has been as an extra in the background. "We've got a trick knife for you, bring a black hoodie and wear black..."
Tonight was a hoot. I met the crew at a bridge in the city. Standing around in the cold, watching the familiar activities of a TV crew on location. I got to whack an "innocent jogger" in the back of the neck (hahaha) but we have more filming to do this week. Apparently I have to finish him off with another implement eek!!
I really liked receiving instructions, carrying them out well, and receiving encouragement. I think they were happy with my work. I wasn't expecting that.
20 Jan 2014, 10:03 am
