How do I come to terms that I will never be famous?

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I actually don't see myself as qualified for acting/singing that much at all, so I'm insane, right? I've even told people, including parents, that I'm going to become an actor in Hollywood. But I just want to be successful, I want to be rich, I want to be able to date models and other famous people so bad. I am not that convinced of the downsides of fame at this point. How can I cope with this hopeless delusion?

And am I that insane? What can I do?

According to Warhol, you should get famous for at least fifteen minutes someday.
FWIW, I've always and still do believe I don't have any problems that the right amount of money can't solve.

People who go into acting have to go into it for the love of it. Almost no one gets famous, and acting is a hard job and you have to deal with constantly putting yourself out there at auditions, and constant rejection. If you don't love acting, you won't get very far because there won't be any motivation keeping you from giving up on a very tough road.

Fame itself should not be a goal, when you pursue any of the arts, be it acting, writing, composing, dancing, painter etc. Most people go into these fields because they have a genuine gift and they sincerely want to express that gift and spend their time honing it.

Sure they'd love for it to be their living also; that's the "holy grail." But a majority percentage of people in the arts never make a full living at it even if they're good -- it's just the way things go.

I have known seriously, seriously gifted people who still wind up waiting tables all their life, even having strenuously pursued all their opportunities, "pounded the pavement" promoting their work, their band, their music, whatever, and gave it their all.

But it's about the right person taking note of what you're doing at the right time. Success is often not even an inevitable outcome of true talent + dedication, as it can be in other professional fields in life. Sadly the arts really are more of a crap shoot than that.

And fame, money and fortune are not a good basis upon which to start out with your goals. You should be in acting for the love of acting first, or you're going to get pretty miserable continuing to pursue it during the time when that fame you want hasn't arrived yet.

"Success" and to make a living from what you love is a fair goal, but "fame" is a much shakier thing to want to have. If you want to be just "famous" post a Youtube video that's so weird or different or controversial that it goes viral. If you want a true career in acting you have to pay your dues dedicating yourself to that craft.

I know, I just wish I can find my talent in the arts somehow. I might love writing though.

Just try to keep trying different things -- might be acting, writing, etc -- and if there is something that "sparks" a passion in you, because you find you truly enjoy doing it or can get lost in the activity, that's the key to something that may lead into a career at some level.

They often say that the best thing to make a living from, if you possibly can, is something you like doing so much that you would do it even if nobody paid you and you never got famous for it. And it's a bonus if those things do begin to happen.

Rich, successful people who date models and actresses don't have to be famous. They are often hedge fund managers, producers, venture capitalists, etc. Fame has many drawbacks and doesn't guarantee success in your career or your love life.

Most people aren't famous so you are very unlikely to become famous. However there are other ways you can get famous besides acting and singing. There is writing, politics, etc. What about going to broadcasting school and be a news announcer? You'd have to go to journalism school too and learn to write but I used to write for a paper and never went to journalism school or took anything remotely like that in college. Also, you could be a dj on the radio if you went to broadcasting school. There are some famous ones. Howard Stern, Mark and Brian (famous in LA for a while but they used to do the morning show in Bham where I lived most of my life), etc. Sports is another option if you have talent or you could be a sports announcer. There are ways to get famous without singing and acting. However, I wouldn't want to be famous. I'd have all these people bothering me all the time and wanting to be my friend and hang out with me when chances are I'd have no interest in them at all. Also, I'd have no privacy.

The only way I'd enjoy being famous would be if I were a Queen. But I'd want to be Queen of England because that is the only country worth being Queen of. There is absolutely no chance of that though. None.

You aren't insane or delusional for wanting to be famous. You would be if you thought you were going to be though, and if you had no talent in whatever it is you thought would make you famous. Talent isn't really needed at times though. Look at that Asian guy who sings so bad and was on American Idol. William Hung might have been his name, but that might be somebody else I'm thinking of. Anyway he was so bad that everybody knows who he is. There are tons of ways to be famous that way if you don't mind being laughed at. Start out with a YouTube channel. Go from there.

But don't count on fame though.

_________________
I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

I guess I don't have to be famous for a better love life or financial security. I do have these things sometimes. One time I want to be a producer, then I want to be the next Ted Turner, the next good writer etc.

But that last post grave me pretty good ideas.

Well, if your only ambition is fame and wealth, yeah, that's going to be kind of difficult to achieve. Not impossible, just insanely difficult which will require years and years of effort. However, if your passions truly lie in singing and acting, you're still 100% capable of doing those things and achieving different levels of success, all of which are equally rewarding. I had/have ambitions of acting and singing and I always envisioned being a big Hollywood star who'd act in ginormous movies and have super-successful critically acclaimed albums; as I got older, I realized that actually achieving those goals were really quite slim. However, once I started playing in bands and working on videos and low-budget movies I saw a completely different side of "fame".

I have friends who've been in particular bands for 20 years, bands who've toured the world and been on national TV and have devoted fanbases, and yet they're still small time bands who play clubs and bars and have between 1,000-5,000 fans on Facebook. These are bands who'll get invited to fly down to South America and play some wild, sold-out shows for a week, then fly back and return to their normal day jobs behind a desk. Likewise, I have some movie friends ranging from a guy who acted in some cult horror movies in the '80s to a guy who makes a living doing special effects on Hollywood films and TV shows to a guy who composes music for shows on Nickelodeon and Disney. None of them are "famous" - you won't ever see their faces on any tabloid magazines - but without fail there will always be a certain group of people who will flip out with excitement when they hear what projects they've been in/worked on.

Being involved with those people made me realize that fame and success is subjective. I didn't need to become People's Sexiest Man Alive to stay true to what I most enjoy doing: performing and entertaining. My lack of motivation over pursuing the arts out of fear I wouldn't become "famous" turned into intense motivation to actually get to do what I want to, because even if the general public doesn't get it, the right people will get it, and even if I'm only earning chump change, making at least one person happy is just as satisfying as making one hundred people happy.

Fun story: just last week, I filled in for one of the aforementioned bands for a small show (maybe 60-80 people?). The band in question all wear masks, so they don't have a regular line-up and I've never recorded anything with them, but after the show an audience member was excitedly coming up to each of us and asked me to sign a gig poster. I don't need to see my name in lights; for that moment I felt like a true rock star. And then I went to Denny's, went home and went to work the next day.

TL;DR: if acting and singing is your passion, pursue it any way you can and you'll find success in your own way. If riches and fame are your only concern, then the arts is simply not for you.