Post your favourite monologue

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As the title suggests, post your favourite monologues(s), from film, TV, books, theatre, or wherever.

Here's one of my favourites, done by Doug Stamper on House of Cards:

"I'm Doug, and I'm an alcoholic. One of the things I do for a living is count. I count votes. Yeas, nays, neutrals, abstaining. And I'm good at it. But the most important count I do has nothing to do with work. It's the number of days since April 4, 1999. As of this morning, that's 5,185. The bigger that number gets, the more it frightens me, because I know all it takes is one drink to go back to zero.

Most people see fear as a weakness. It can be. Sometimes for my job, I have to put fear in other people. I know that's not right. But if I'm honest, like the fourth step asks us to be, I have to be ruthless, because failure is not an option. The same goes for my sobriety. I have to be ruthless with myself. I have to use my fear. It makes me stronger. Like everyone in this room, I can't control who I am.

But I can control the zero. F**k the zero."

I'm not posting the whole thing, but mine is Scarlet O'Hara's "I'll never be hungry again" one.

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Col. Jessep: Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

"A Few Good Men"

Andy Dufresne: Get busy living, or get busy dying.

"The Shawshank Redemption"

Mona Lisa Vito: [comes out of the bathroom] Imagine you're a deer. You're prancing along, you get thirsty, you spot a little brook, you put your little deer lips down to the cool clear water... BAM! A fvckin' bullet rips off part of your head! Your brains are laying on the ground in little bloody pieces! Now I ask ya. Would you give a f**k what kind of pants the son of a b!tch who shot you was wearin'?

"My Cousin Vinny"

Most of mine would be from Babylon 5:

"No dictator, no invader, can hold an imprisoned population by force of arms forever. There is no greater power in the universe than the need for freedom. Against this power governments and tyrants and armies cannot stand. The Centauri learned this lesson once. We will teach it to them again. Though it take a thousand years, we - will - be -free." -- G'Kar

"It was the end of the earth year 2260, and the war had paused, suddenly, and unexpectedly. All around us, it was as if the universe were holding its breath.... waiting. All life can be broken down into moments of transition, and moments of revelation. This had the feeling of both. G'Quan wrote: 'There is a greater darkness than the one we fight. It is the darkness of the soul that has lost its way. The war we fight is not against powers and principalities, it is against chaos, and despair. Greater than the death of flesh is the death of hope, the death of dreams. Against this peril, we can never surrender.' The future is all around us, waiting in moments of transition to be born in moments of revelation. No one knows the shape of that future, or where it will take us. We know only that it is always born in pain." -- G'Kar

"Will you follow me in to fire? In to storm? In to darkness? In to death? And The Nine said, "Yes!". Then do this in testimony to the one who will follow, who will bring death, couched in the promise of new life, and renewal, disguised as defeat. From birth, through death and renewal, you must put aside old things, old fears, old lives. For this is your death, the death of flesh, the death of pain, the death of yesterday. Taste of it, and be not afraid, for I am with you until the end of time. Taste of it!" -- Delenn

"How do you know the chosen ones? No greater love hath a man than he give up his life for another. Not for glory, not for fame, but there in the dark, where no one will ever know, or see. I have been in the service of the Vorlons for centuries, looking... Diogynes with his lamp looking for a man willing to die for all the wrong reasons. At last, my job is finished. Yours is just beginning. When the darkness comes, know this: You are the right people, in the right place, at the right time." -- Sebastian

And from Snatch:

"Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by a horrible c**t. Me." -- Bricktop

Rust Cohle's take on the meaninglessness of human existence in the first season of True Detective. I wish I could remember the speech verbatim, but as I can't, I will summarize: that human consciousness is just a mistake of evolution, that we are not special in the least, but rather are fleeting and minuscule in an indifferent universe. We live our lives only because of a biological imperative that we do, and the best thing to do is to stop reproducing, and walk into extinction together as a race.