The Dino-Aspie Ex-Café (for Those 40+... or feeling creaky)

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Sleep sweet, Sleepy!!

Thank you for the mention of the songs. I'll check them out today.

WHAT!! !??! Our Zanne, made zombie?!? Could only be done-st by a too-long stay in the land of accountants and wicked widget-counting managers! Their over-long droning scraping your brain like briny lobster-claw barnacles! Quelle horreur!! !
<Chuck swoons at the thought, feet in air. Coming to, hours later, he sets a very large pot 'o coffee in front of zombie Zanne, pulls the forks out of her eyes, and proceeds with Operation Deprogram Dear Zanne (ODDZ).>


"Zanne!"
"ZAAAAANNE!"
(gently shakes Zanne, who sits unresponsive)



<OMG!! !, thinks Chuck. It's worse than I thought! Zanne would never allow herself to be touched! !! !! Chuck feeds the coffee into Zanne intravenously>

"Zanne! Do you remember 'riding crops'? 'table-top tirades'? some dude named 'Cabana Han'?"



< ...??? Better get more coffee thinks Chuck ...one of Postie's 'no-plan' plans ...string and duck tape ...Wizard Merle ...Lau fractals ...shiny stuff ...a very large muffin ...12 computers ... Chuck runs left ...no, right ... no, left ...squirrels back and forth - then runs into himself, knocking himself out. As the light fades to black, he sends an SOS to all Aspies everywhere, which nannarob can also hear (being fluent in Aspie, as well as NT...)>

_____________________________________________________________
(yes - he used "all right". )

It is an NT conspiracy I tell you! One day I had to sit on the phone with two auditors from India who were screaming at each other from 8:30 A.M. until 2:30 P.M. without stopping. This was in the middle of an external audit. I finally interrupted them and said, "Okay, I never thought I would utter these words, but I must eat NOW or I will become the ugly Zanne. I don't want to sit with her and you certainly do not want to talk to her." They apologized profusely, ended the call immediately and we all went to eat. When we got back on the call I explained to them that if they were going to continue their fighting, I would have to call back in when it was over because they had used up their quota of my empathy for fighting...for the year! They laughed and said they weren't fighting, just being emotional. I said, "That's worse. There is absolutely nothing emotional about an audit. They are facts and facts are whatever they are. There's nothing emotional in that." That made them laugh even more. <sigh> They just don't get it.

However, when I get mad, even my old boss says, "I am so glad I am not the one on the other end of that phone when you get like that." Zanne<----- the voice that scares federal auditors. It's like an Aspie nightmare!! !! !! !! !

Oh, Zanne, I don't think I could have been as patient as you were with the "emotions." When people get emotional over facts, I find it severely annoying. And such a waste of energy! I'm glad you told them what they needed to hear!

It's the double whammy - NTism and culturalism. They aren't trying to be annoying but as they say, they get very "passionate" when they discuss things. I told them I was raised as a very cold and in control German where emotion was verboten. See, they could accept that and I didn't have to tell them they were severely overloading my synapsis. On the other hand, they just laugh about it because they think it's funny that I'm so different. I guess they figure that is offset by the amount of what I consider useless data in my head that they find invaluable. The auditors love that they don't have to explain why they need what they need and the managers love it because I know what they need to do and why it has to be done that way. I'm in the middle completely miserable because this entire job is VERBAL!! !! !!

I really do feel like Alex, strapped to a chair with my eyelids propped open as they pour nonsense into my head. Or, like the guy in the Talking Heads song going, "How did I get here?" That reminds me of dh walking around the apartment in Italy singing Talking Heads.

And you may find yourself living in a shotgun shack
And you may find yourself in another part of the world
And you may find yourself behind the wheel of a large automobile
And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful
wife
And you may ask yourself-Well...How did I get here?


And you may ask yourself
How do I work this?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that large automobile?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful house!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!


You have to love David Byrne.

Zanne, ...just sit, watch and listen ...these should help bring you back to a normal state (poor tortured soul! tsk tsk!! !):
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_GBwuYuOOs&feature=related[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c7j1SwM__-o&feature=related[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3y899kkoSI&feature=related[/youtube]
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdzVpcvZgNk&feature=related[/youtube]
...home, home, where I wanted to go...
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9j_RZDqYc4&feature=related[/youtube]
(...there are no emotional arguing auditors there... )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNtoGW0atis
(...Talking Heads' autistic David Byrne - knew I loved that guy - didn't know he was one 'o us...)

Chuck, you have a unique sense of fun. No ... thet's not quite right. You and Lau and PP and a few of the other men are unique and I miss your play. Then of course we have Blessed and Nan. Have we all become too serious?

My funny is lost, Nannarob! I've looked high and low and can't seem to find it anywhere. I may have to buy a new one.

Robyn! Thank goodness you heard my mental SOS! Exactly so! Now only serious frivolity can save our Zanne! Quick! Assume this position with me...


...there, good... ...now, let's chant something aboriginal - you pick the tune...

Lauri! Thenk.. gudness.. yer.. hee-a. ...Hard ...to ...breathe *GASP* in ...thes ..po-zition...

You are the only one on here that can assume that position.

I can assume things about that position - for instance, I assume that would be excruciatingly uncomfortable...

Chuck, Chuck, Chuck............. I'm tempted to leave you there like that.

I'm stuck! One leg caught over the shoulder. The other in the air. Can't move. Groan..

Jon! Glad you ....hear-ed me! ...Found ...zombie Zanne's mouse:


What ...do ...you ...make uv ...thes?
(Chuck points at mouse with foot over head)

Robyn? ... know a tune?...

Last edited by Chuck on 02 Jan 2008, 4:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Oh my Lord!! !! Look what you've done now! I think you owe Robyn a free massage Mr. Masseuse dude!