I feel Absolute Terror.

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Right. This is my first post here, and I feel extremely nervous. Actually, deathly panic would be more accurate.

I'm not even sure if I can do this, posting on a message board.

I haven't been professionally diagnosed as having Asperger's, though many non/semi qualified people have told me that I may have it, and I've taken a few online quizzes that have reinforced my suspicions of the possibility.

Anyway...
All my life I've felt like a prisoner, both in my body and in society generally. I've never been able to communicate adequately with people, and I've been unable to form any kind of comfortable relationship with anyone, aside from two members of my immediate family.

I've never felt much (positive) emotion towards individual people, except in a vague way towards all humanity. Mostly fear and indifference, most of the time simultaneously.

I've had bouts of vague suicidal thoughts, because I've never felt 'normal', or had friends, or a girlfriend.

In the past I've tried researching asperger's, but almost immediately after I start, I have some undefinable urge to stop. Almost as though I'm afraid of learning the (possible) truth about myself.

But I'm afraid to get an official diagnosis, and even if I could bring myself to, I have no idea where to go.

I may have it, I may not. I'll probably never know.

I'm not sure what good this will do me. Oh well, maybe I'll feel a bit better after this.




Sorry for the incoherent rambling.

Hello PrisonerZero, welcome,

I hope you will find information and support you need, here on WP.

Enjoy your stay on the Wrong Planet!

Hi, PrisonerZero, and welcome to WP!

You are always welcome to tell us whatever's on your mind - "rambling" is a perfectly good way to do it, especially if you haven't had anybody to talk to about these things.

"Prisoner Zero has escaped".


BTW. Welcome to WrongPlanet.

It all makes complete sense to me!

Welcome home.

Greetings, fellow-traveler PrisonerZero, and welcome to the Wrong Planet community.

Get your self diagnosed! At least you know where you stand at.. If it is not then you can work on further what is going on. It takes courage though, I know, but do it!

Thanks everyone. I'm surprised that anyone replied.

BARK! BARK!


When I type or write anything, it never seems 'right' to me.



But I don't know where to go, or have enough money to pay someone qualified to diagnose.

Sounds as though you might have people around you, reaffirming your need to avoid socialization situations beyond the ones they want you to be involved in, that is, "telling you how to live your life."

I might be wrong. But Aspergers people can be easily manipulated and controlled in that way, because they are often trusting and nieve. It's certainly how I was made to feel on numerous occasions, by individuals who were ept at controlling others' lives and if they didn't have other lives to bungle and control, they wouldn't have a life.

Just a thought and nice to meet you.

Sharon (North Carolina)

Oh, there's free services.

Call SAMHSA's 24-Hour Toll-Free Treatment Referral Helpline
(Substance Abuse and Mental Health Treatment)
at 1-800-662-HELP (1-800-662-4357).

SAMHSA National Helpline Frequently Asked Questions
Find Mental Health Services & Treatment
•Mental Health Services Locator

samhsa dot gov/treatment/

Federal website.

I don't really have any contact with people (outside of here, that is).


Nice to meet you too, and thanks for the info.

To WrongPlanet!! !

I was speaking of family and people that affect your life. Often you may not feel close to them, but they will try to control your life, i.e., Aspie vs. Psycho Mom on Youtube.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyIf0zU1Dzg[/youtube]



Reminds me of some family I have.

I think you've came to the right place, and the right people to get advice from.

Ah, ok.

I don't really have any family members like that.


In the video it sounded like the characters pronounced Aspergers as 'ass burgers'.

It is pronounced AssBurgers

It comes from a European name, so it shouldn't have the same connotation in the homeland.

Personally I prefer to pronounce it "Az Berjers"

I've always heard it pronounced 'asp pergers'