Just joined, introducing myself

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Hello everybody, I just joined this site. I am a 54 yr old man from Australia. I have not been diagnosed with Aspergers but I figure I am an Aspie because I have most of the symptoms, especially social ineptitude, poor coordination, poor spatial sense, difficulty relating to people. obsession with rule-like behaviour. I don't have the habit of obsessively talking about some particular hobby horse, however!

I try to be friendly and helpful to people and to make myself liked, but it doesn't seem to work as I am always saying something that offends people although that is never my intention. I do not seem to understand when to speak up and when to stay silent. This has got me into a lot of trouble. Some people think I am outspoken and rude while others think I am too quiet and uncommunicative. I don't follow other people's jokes and they don't follow mine. I cannot seem to find the appropriate thing to say. So the result is I have virtually no friends and no social life and I am at a point where I am getting worried about what will happen to me in old age. I am married but my wife has an alcohol problem and for this reason we decided it was best not to have kids. Her problem has decreased somewhat lately, but now it is too late for kids.

So I joined this site hoping that at least I could make some online friends who might understand my point of view, and perhaps get some suggestions as to what I could do to get a more normal kind of life. I hope to particiipate in the forums from time to time if I can find something to contribute.

Hey there! I'm from across the ditch in NZ, am 16 years old, feel like a 14 year old, act that age half the time and act double that age the other half of the time! I've been officially diagnosed with AS since I was twelve, have a ridiculously large story (65,000 words!), and joined here about a week ago! I have some of the problems you have with jokes; often times the gag just goes right over my head. I hope you enjoy your stay here on WP, as have I. Really wish I had more to say, so if you could kick off this conversation I'd really appreciate it (things are bit quiet around here at the moment, or at least I think it is).

Hi welcome. I hope you find this site helpful.

Welcome!

I'm 50 and was diagnosed something over a year ago. Parts of your story are indeed familiar, and you will find more matches of experience as you follow the discussions.
(And people with different storiies: AS folk vary a lot!)

Hello and welcome.

You were saying that it's too late to have childreen... If this is age related, just bear in mind that Picasso had his last child when he was 92!

Still, if it become phisiologicaly impossible to conceave, maybe you could consider some for of artificial insimenation? Or adopting. This of course, if you and your wife do indeed want to have childreen. All I'm saying is that where ever theres a wall, more often than not there is a way around it.

All the best!

Hi!

Welcome to Wrongplanet!

I hope you enjoy posting here!

I have all the symptoms except poor coordination. No real friends and completely alone all my life.
I have been a teacher (very bad teacher), but with great effort I made it. If this may be of encouragment to you I am twenty years older than you. I live by the day but I think I can make it for some more time. Of course I am not married. Nor have I had fixed girlfriends.

Your post seems to describe some of the symptoms of Asperger's.

Welcome to WP!

Hi and welcome to WP

Thanks for the welcome. I'm a fair bit older than you! but I guess I've always had Aspergers. The conditiion seems to have become known only recently, so maybe there is hope that before you get too much older somebody will come up with a treatment. Having Aspergers at 54, I feel its too late to expect that I will ever change, its just a question now of finding a way to cope with it!

Thanks. Actually its not me, its my wife that is now too old (49). Adoption laws stop us from adopting at this age. The other thing is at this stage, I don't think we could cope with the pressure of having kids, conceived or otherwise. It's not so much that I want kids, more the fear of growing old with no friends or family (I was an only child, parents now deceased, my wife has split with her only sister).

I'm so sorry to hear your story. Youve probably got a much worse life than me. I manage OK at present, its more that Im concerned about the future. If you would like to write, feel free.

Personally I, like many, many others with Aspegers, don't actually plan to get cured anytime soon (and some even get graciously offended by it). It's just that after living with it for so long, you just get used to it. As an example, would you want to be turned into a robot because of all the futuristic features it offers? I wouldn't. My case of AS is only fairly mild, so it hasn't intruded my life like it has for others (check out another topic of mine in the Autism Discussion boards, "Did you notice you were different when you were a kid?" to see what I mean). However, I would like to know what it'd be like without it for a day (check out the "Would you want to be NT for a day?" topic). If you could cure it via some kind of ointment or some pills, I'd go with that, but I'd sneakily only apply it when I felt like I'd want to go through a day being NT or when it'd be convenient. I'd never want to be NT forever.

Personally I, like many, many others with Aspegers, don't actually plan to get cured anytime soon (and some even get graciously offended by it). It's just that after living with it for so long, you just get used to it. As an example, would you want to be turned into a robot because of all the futuristic features it offers? I wouldn't. My case of AS is only fairly mild, so it hasn't intruded my life like it has for others (check out another topic of mine in the Autism Discussion boards, "Did you notice you were different when you were a kid?" to see what I mean). However, I would like to know what it'd be like without it for a day (check out the "Would you want to be NT for a day?" topic). If you could cure it via some kind of ointment or some pills, I'd go with that, but I'd sneakily only apply it when I felt like I'd want to go through a day being NT or when it'd be convenient. I'd never want to be NT forever.[/quote]

Well, I wouldn't want to be turned into a robot, but if I could find a way to become more socially proficient and successful, then I would certainly do it. Not if it meant lowering my intelligence or giving up aspects of my personality which I like. But if there were no significant side effects, why not?

Same argument I propose. But then some people don't want to change, and I can accept that, it's their desicion.

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