That awkward moment when you realize you are different.

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Hello everyone.. I'm new to the site and just as new to AS. I actually watched the movie Mary and Max for some weird reason I had to watch it.. The whole time I was watching it I couldn’t stop thinking how big of a connection I had with Ole max.. Although I am not of age or even overweight.. His mental outlook reflected mine. Once I hear of his diagnoses I looked it up ASAP. While reading wiki (I know..i know) I broke down completely, not out of fear.. but to finally have 24 years of questioning, wishing, hate and just overall dissatisfaction with who I was, and why I was always so strange. So I embraced it and spent the whole night researching it. The next day I went and set up an appointment and after all the test I've done my whole life it all clicked and we realized I was in fact blessed with AS. I've joined and this in hopes that I can meet people like myself.. It feels weird to say that.. How beautiful though, to know I'm not alone. I'm currently waiting for my 5 day "im not a spammer" period to finish up so i can share some pictures of my art.. which has become my most recent obsession. I've never painted before a year ago, i hope i can chat with a few people on here and finally have someone understand me. Its both relieving and overwhelming to know that i'm not as "weird" or "unique" as i thought i was.. but at the same time i know i still am. I find myself personally seeing this as kind of gods dirty worker.. I'm always very blunt and critical and find different ways to do things to make them better.. I ran across a quote about AS where NS people are the people made to simple just keep the human race going.. and AS people are built to make the human race better. Almost like I'm a machine with a job, which is odd because i've always felt like that. The down side of that is the only thing i want is to just be in love and be passionate for one person.. but i always mess it up. Well.. i could go on and on about things that many of you probably know far too well. I guess i'm writing to see that exact thing happen.. Have you guys and girls just say "yeap... I know how you feel" it would be amazing because.. for once i think i might believe it.

Please search for my blog damonfarkas . blogspot. com (not allowed to put in links yet ='( hopefully i can repost in five days and give you guys some pics

Take care everyone, I hope i can be accepted here..

-Damon

More like that moment you realized WHY we are different. That there is a reason, and that there are some tools for coping.

I always knew I was different, for a long, long time I thought if I could just learn to observe others better, or learn to say the right things, or stop fidgeting, I could finally pass for an average person.

haha, i agree. I just like making things awkward... which makes alot of sense now.. 0_o

yes i too have done the same thing.. and finding out now that i have AS at the age of 23 i've build up man mask which i thought were just ways to be accepted for my weirdness.. but now after researching i'm blow away at the amount of things i've done to hide something i had no idea i was doing. So i'm basically learning myself all over again.. New life.. how weird.

Welcome, hope you enjoy your stay here

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Mick

Awkward moment that I realized I was different? I have always known I was different. At first it was shown that I was smart (in the gifted program). But I figured out I have aspergers