Hi... I'm not sure if I belong here.

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I haven't been diagnosed with Aspergers or anything. I'm 31 years old now and I've always known there was something off about me. I just heard about Aspergers like a few months ago but only learned more about it in the past week or 2. I was treated in high school for ADD and depression but it didn't seem to help any. I tried again (for depression) after I was discharged from the army and I still didn't feel any different. I don't have any friends currently, and I can count the number I've had in my life on one hand. I've never had a long term relationship (or short term really) with a woman. I think the most dates I've had with a girl is 3. Most women just start to ignore me after a while and I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I could go on and on about my woes with the opposite sex but suffice it to say I have no social skills. I can get along with co-workers, but it usually takes a long time, 2 or 3 months, to warm up to anyone. I've also realized recently that I only seem capable of mimicking the social behaviors of others, even when I do warm up to them. I sort of adapt my personality to different people and situations, and I don't know how to act around unfamiliar people and situations. I can speak to others to convey information just fine, but anything personal or friendly is difficult for me. I am also very uncomfortable in large groups.

I'm not sure if this Aspergers or an autism spectrum disorder since I don't think I really have any repetitive or obsessive behaviors. I've thought about trying to get it diagnosed but I don't want to affect my career and it doesn't seem like a diagnosis gives you much help except for piece of mind. I definitely don't want to have to go to a class to try and learn social skills.

Does this sound familiar to anyone here? Does anyone think these are signs of Aspergers or an ASD?

Well, since you asked, here's a link to a pretty comprehensive online test created by professionals in the field. Be sure to answer the questions truthfully.

Aspie Quiz RDOS

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Though diagnostic criteria are sometimes used in an all-or-nothing manner for formal diagnosis, Attwood describes in his book the problems with the DSM-IV guidelines for AS, and how he deviates in his diagnostic criteria. I see ASD as a sub-spectrum in continuum with one that encompasses NTs on the opposite end.

That being said -- yes, I do think you exhibit many of the symptoms, and I can relate to your experiences. But diagnosis is often drawn at the line where impairments impact the individual not just socially, but occupationally as well -- which I do not think is your case outside of the less-structured social settings you mention.

I guess what I'm getting at is that regardless of whether or not you warrant a formal diagnosis, it's your symptoms and experiences that are underlying. Welcome to the forums!

OK, thanks.

I notice we've been having about a dozen or so members join every week for the last few months thanks to search engine traffic bringing AS and AS-curious people to our forum. Open discussion is what makes Wrong Planet a hot destination, Ron, so welcome.