Hi! I'm a 38 year old male. My journey here has brought not only answers but also more questions. My search for understanding is recent but my life is my story. I'll introduce myself with my recent introduction to aspergers.
About a month ago, my LTR girlfriend and I were listening to the radio program that featured a husband and wife and the challenges they faced due to the unusual behavior of the husband. It was revealed that the husband suffered from ASD and the couple sought counseling and worked on improving their marriage. They remained a happily married couple as both worked around ASD. At the end of the program, I had commented to my girlfriend that I was glad that I wasn't like that. She gave me an unusual glance and changed the subject but her odd look stuck with me.
A week went by and following an argument with her, I decided to take the test for ASD mentioned in the radio program. I was compelled to show her that I was "normal" and nothing like the husband featured on the show. As I took the test, I started to feel uncomfortable with some of the questions. It felt as though a very large portion of the test was written specifically for me. Finally, I finished the test and calculated my score still hoping that I would prove I was an NT. The contradictory evidence stared me right in the face. Me? Most likely an Aspie?
I talked to her about it that same morning and she wasn't shocked in the least. I talked to my sister who also wasn't surprised. As a matter of fact, I talked to the handful of people in my life that have known me a long time and all of them agreed with the test.
I have since taken a few ASD tests and all back up the original test score. It has begun to put my life in a different perspective. All my unusual behavior, my lack of closeness to people through my life, the lack of emotional connections, the delay in feeling empathy, noticing patterns, odd speech and gestures, the list goes on and on. It all makes sense. My erratic responses have led people to even accuse me of being on drugs. That's something I never experimented with in my life.
Now I am looking for a better understanding of myself and how to better survive and flourish in an NT world. I have been through a number of jobs and 3 marriages but I have managed to keep my latest job for 3 years and have a wonderfully supportive girlfriend who loves and tolerates my behavior and who has allowed me to open up to her about all the things that go on inside of me.
I am looking forward to posting and reading on the forum and getting to know the other members of this community. I'm slow to warm up but can be helpful, funny, and outgoing as I get to know people.
05 May 2013, 2:30 am
