Hello fellow members.
Just a quick summary of myself.
I have always generally felt different to other people, I would get confused or frustrated at my poor ability to interact socially.
In friendships, they are always the ones who instigate an event or something to do. Its weird, to me it feels like a lot of effort, the thought of socialising, thinking of things to say and stuff, but its never as bad as I think.
I think I scare girls away with my awkwardness and my honesty. There was a girl I really liked, and for some reason I said she was the one I wanted to spend my life with. Didn't work out after that. I feel like I can be normal for periods of time, but my mind catches me up in the end.
I am generally an anxious person, and my main issue over the years has been health anxiety.
When I was very young, I thought my hearing and eyesight were both going, turns out just the eyesight! I also used to think I was losing parts of my brain when I regurgitated food that seemed to resemble brain. I was very young, but still! I better add my Dad died when I was 5, and I kind of thought my health worry's were solely related to that, but I don't know.
Then, when I was 10, I thought I had cancer, didn't tell anyone, and kept thinking it until I finally told my Mum aged 20 because I was getting palpitations and feeling very anxious.
Doctors confirmed no cancer. Became depressed because I still felt like s**t mentally and physically, when I expected some kind of lift from the good news.
Then, started to consider my diet as a reason for my malaise. Went to doctors, tested for celiac disease. Nope. Blood all normal. Went on gluten free diet anyway. Eczema stopped flaring up and less depression. Also some weird changes, like more body hair, and wisdom teeth coming through. Goats milk then cured eczema. Starting to realise I will always have health or other anxieties, and what I really want to change, my mind, I can't.
If anyone has any questions I would love to answer, because I haven't spoken to anyone about autism/aspergers, and I would love to know what people think, because there's lots of things I haven't said.
30 Jan 2014, 8:22 pm
