I was on this site a long time ago but stopped coming because I asked my therapist about me having Asperger's and she didn't think much of it. Well years later this same therapist is recommending I get a psychological assessment because being on the spectrum could explain a lot of stuff. The reason she didn't think it before is because she asked if I struggled with eye contact and anxiety as a kid and I said no, I now realize that I did but didn't realize it after asking people that knew me as a kid, something came out, poor eye contact, really intelligent but a hard time communicating with the other kids. Kept to myself , minded my own business type of girl, quiet, had a few friends and talked when it was something I was interested in. I myself growing up never felt like I fit in always the odd one out. I was teased a lot and nothing I did seemed right. I was a perfectionist and an overachiever, I put everything into school , originally I had trouble reading was in the lowest level group in grade 3 but was determined I would not be a poor reader and read like crazy and my reading improved. Another thing I was obsessed with was running, I did other sports to but I was more individual sports, track and field, cross country, swimming, I was fast which means I did well in soccer and basketball as far as playing but coordination wise I struggled , one thing I remember about school is all the girls being able to do double dutch and me not being able to, I didn't make the volleyball team because my hand eye coordination suxed. Anyways I have noticed stuff more as I have grown up still struggle with eye contact accept when I am talking about something I am interested in. Struggle in social situation most of the time don't get the point of the conversation, I hate general chit chat and gossip and weather and stuff I don't see the point, though get me into an intellectual discussion about social justice, sociology, psychology and its hard to shut me up. I get obsessed with stuff very easily and lose track of time. I need structure and routine and when I don't I struggle a lot more emotionally. To much noise and light and social situations bother me, sometimes I get so overloaded I a) shut down and isolate or b) explode on a person over a silly thing like not cleaning all the cutlery ( me not cleaning because I thought I did but didn't realize I was missing some hiding under the pot that I had soaking. ) I'm 26 but still live with my parents, I have worked but never keep a job long, I work well with kids because I can relate to them and they are easier to talk to then adults. I struggle with basic stuff like brushing my teeth, washing my face, showering etc. Just started to learn to cook, but cooking itself been known to lead me to have a panic attack. Just now learning to do laundry but I tend to forget its there or put stuff through the wash and wash all stuff together even though I'm told you should wash it separately but I dont' see the point. I wear loose clothes because clothes that are too tight bug me. I hate tags and itchy clothes. I've been known to like a shirt my mom bought when I was a kid and never wear it because it was itchy. I get overwhelmed emotionally really easily. I have always been drawn to Autism whether it's researching it or working with kids with Autism but now wondering if its cause I could relate. I have struggles with depression and anxiety, and been diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder which I have read can be a misdiagnoses for autism. Also struggled with an eating disorder. I never really see the point of wearing makeup unless dressing up for something and even then I have to force. I tend to be a camillion and fit in where I can go off other people's ideas on how to behave socially but have trouble reading social cues, especially body language and a lot of times I don't get sarcasm and am the last one to get a joke. Though the jokes I do get are very literal ones like play on words. I have a struggle keeping relationships both as friends and romantically. At one point I was really naïve and it got me into a lot of trouble and some traumatic situations because I was totally clueless what was going and how to get out. I've been in and out of treatment and psych wards and stuff for the last 8 years but nothing really been helping and I'm wondering if this is the breakthrough I needed. Just thinking about it gives me hope and makes me like wow this could explain a lot of stuff and I'm not going crazy. Any thoughts from anyone, especially on the diagnostic process? I read this article http://taniaannmarshall.wordpress.com/2 ... mment-4282 and I was like wow that fits me so well like I copied it and pasted it to word and then highlighted everything that fit for me and probably highlighted 90% of it.
14 Feb 2014, 8:57 pm
Autism is just a label for people to treat you as if your an alien being who needs to feel ashamed for having Autism :/
Sorry for sounding stupid but I'm sleep deprived right now lol
