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Hi, I'm here because I feel like there is something wrong with me socially. I really couldn't care about putting a label on it, but I seem to struggle with things that most people find easy or innate.

I'm 21, and will be going into my final year of university this September. In all honesty I can't wait to finish my degree but the prospect of finding a job afterwards is equally terrifying.

I have no social skills. I can't remember ever having someone I would consider a good friend who I would feel comfortable telling personal things to. Hell, I've very rarely had friends at all. I only ever seem to gather a couple of acquaintances - people who I'm ok at talking to in classes that we share, for example. Yeah I know how to discuss the work we're doing, and that's where my ability stops. In general situations, I have absolutely no idea what I am supposed to say to people. I see people every day who can hold a conversation with strangers which seems impossible to me - because what do they talk about? My mum isn't the most outgoing person either, and she's made similar comments to me about how her more outgoing friends just basically go on a monologue for half an hour gossiping about people she's never even met or things that have happened to their family members.

I'll say straight up that I don't think I'm 'too smart' for people. Not at all. Since I started university, if anything I've begun to feel really stupid. I just don't know how to talk to people at all. If a stranger said 'hi' to me, I'd just say 'hi' back and be unable to think of anything else to say. I know it seems really pessimistic to say this, but I honestly think I am a very boring person. I don't even think I have any hobbies or interests. I just spend too much time playing video games alone in my room and apart from when I'm going to classes, hardly speak to anyone besides my mum. In my first year of uni, I lived in a student house with 4 others, and it was hell and I never left my room because I was 'scared' of them, which seems ridiculous but it's the truth.

I've looked all around the internet for things about overcoming shyness and all that. It's really frustrating to hear everybody telling you to just not think too much and say what comes naturally. Nothing comes naturally. I want so badly to be able to have friends, I just have no idea how. As I said, any people I manage to talk to just stop at 'acquaintances who I talk to about work' because I don't know what else to say.

Sorry for the rambling, I'll be quiet now like I'm telling you I always am.

Hey Charlie,

You should have rambled on--we're Aspies, after all! Especially since you apologized for your rambling.

Welcome to the Forum.

Do you have any particular special interests?

What's your major at University?

Haha just about the only place I'm able to ramble at all is on the internet.
And really no, I don't think I have any particular strong interests actually...
At uni, I'm studying geophysics. It's what it sounds like - geology and physics. A lot of it is about the oil industry though, which was really not what I signed up for. :/ I'm actually considering becoming a high school teacher in the future, but I can see how that would be difficult for me too..

Hi & Welcome

If you have struggles with socializing, whether NT or having an ASD, you have come to the right place!