Hi I'm new here

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I have Aspergers, I found out from a Doctor a couple of years ago. I have been reluctant to seek other people with Autism for friendship, mainly because IMO... upfront I appear to be quite normal (or not having Autism) and I didn't see why it was necessary, but since every single website I go to, no one ever comments on my works (I'm a guitarist and composer), or shows any major interest in me, and since I've been lonely and depressed because of that... and the fact that it's been this way my whole life (and I'm 31), I feel like I give up... there must just be something about the way I do things that common folk just don't like, I just wish someone could tell me exactly what it is, because not knowing is very upsetting to me because I feel like I haven't said anything unlikeable.

So I'm here now hoping that I can make a friend here, hoping that maybe people with the same thing as me might think more like me (and me like them), and might be the ones who would be interested in my existence in this life (because as of right now I feel like it's a pointless one).

As of right now, I have no friend to interact with regularly, and I haven't in more than 8 years. I just want to advertise however that I do view this Aspergers as a psychiatric disorder, and makes living life hell, and I wish I had a cure so I could just be like everyone else, because as of right now I do in fact feel like I'm on the wrong planet for how I am.

So all that being said, if anyone is interested in being friends with me then please PM or something, I can't guarantee I'll gel with you, but I'd rather find out then just have no friends the rest of my life, life feels pretty empty to me right now, all I ever have is myself, I feel like I'm a big secret to everyone when I'm just messing around with hobbies all alone in my room, and despite all of my negative qualities (because of this Aspergers and whatnot), I feel like I have too many good qualities for me to just be not known about, almost like my existence is a big waste if I'm the only one taking me in. Does this make sense? (Also I didn't mean to sound full of myself, but I do enjoy myself and my good qualities, but no one else ever seems to, and it's been that way my whole life.)

So yeah, I hate to be all desperate like this, it probably looks really lame, but it's either that or probably be friendless forever, so hopefully someone here can change that for me.

Welcome oxytocin.

Why did you choose your name?

What kind of music do you play?

Hey Oxytocin welcome.

Ummm... I'm not sure if I can answer that first one and not be in violation of the board rules. I'll try to avoid the details that might not be suitable... I was watching a certain TV show on The Learning Channel (I think) and they talked about Oxytocin and what it does in the body and I like what it does so I decided to use that as my user name.

And as far as music... I love mainly Heavy Metal (distorted guitars), but with a strong preference for symphonic instrumentation alongside it. I also prefer female vocals to male. Film Score type music I love, and Classical too. But I also like Trance/Techno and Relaxation music sometimes.

EDIT: Just noticed you asked what I played and not what I liked listening to... well Heavy Metal guitars and I also love composing Symphonic or Ambient type music in music programs.

I love symphonic music.

Yes, I like all the symphonic type instruments, the Strings and Harp are my favorites, my least favorite would be brass but I still like it (especially for action or adventure type sound). I also love Pipe Organ and Harpsichord more than most people seem to (especially the Harpsichord). And then I also love Piano a lot, can't forget that.

I haven't really gotten into heavy symphonic music listening yet (I just know I love that music from hearing them in various places throughout life, and also from the metal bands I like who use Symphonies), so I wouldn't have much to tell you what composers or whatever I like, but I know I love Bach... and the Phantom Of The Opera soundtrack I absolutely love (as well as the movie).

For me though it's hard having motivation to actually write music when I'm mainly the only person I'm going to get a reaction from for it, which has been the case for most of my life since I've been able to write music.

That sucks.

Nothing is lame.



Scandi-wegain symphonic metal? Like who?

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

A couple of the bands I like are from around there... my favorite is Einherjer, the way everything has a folk or medieval sound to it is like awesome to me. The way they orchestrated things in their music is totally me. And also Nightwish, who is quite different from Einherjer, but they are more operatic and sound more like a film score a lot of times. I love film score type sound, so yeah they are awesome. I also like Lullacry who is also from that area (although they don't have as much symphonic stuff as the other two I mentioned).

There's also some other bands I love not from that area... 2 Dutch bands, Within Temptation and Epica, a Swiss band Lunatica, a Spanish band Forever Slave, an Italian band Lacuna Coil, and an American band Evanescence.

Some of these bands I haven't heard all of their music yet, but I loved what I did hear enough to have them as my favorites.

I also love Dream Theater and Metallica (despite not having symphonic elements as much, but of course Metallica did S&M and Dream Theater have some symphonic type tracks as well). I also like Masterplan quite a bit too (despite not a ton of symphonic elements).

Welcome. I am of the opinion that it is good to have friends from various backgrounds. So it is not bad to befriend some others who have autism as well as those who do not.