Okay, here I am, posting things.

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Oh boy. Not sure why, but now I'm kind of nervous. lol
I didn't think I would ever post on a website like this.
I'm technically undiagnosed.
I think I would be diagnosed with Autism over Aspergers just because I much like Ms. Grandin didn't speak until I was 3-ish years old.
Everyone suspected it growing up. I'm in my mid-twenties now.
I still (unfortunately) live at home.
My parents are NT and were terribly unhelpful and didn't understand my autism growing up, and overall were kind of terrible about helping me with these things. To be fair autism wasn't really known in their circles back then so... but now I'm finding out all sorts of things for myself.
That's partly why I am here.
This site looks really communal and interesting. So, I wanted to give it a shot.
Thanks Everyone! : D

hi, unfortunate aspie. welcome. i hope you find what you need here. what things do you enjoy doing? i sing, cook healthy food, and keep in touch with folks via the web.

Hello!!
Pleasure meeting you.
I like to think I like lots of things.
I am, by predilection, a very academic sort of person. I enjoy science very much, in particular physics, and chemistry. I have loved these subjects very very very much ever since I was a kid. Anything involving those subjects are just a blast! I also really like geology, and I used to enjoy biology. I have also studied paleo-biology a bit. Took a couple in classes back in undergrad on high-temp geochemistry, although they were really grad. school level classes. Quite challenging back in the day!!

I am trying to be healthier in my habits now-a-days, but I struggle with Depression a bit so eating healthily tends to be a challenge.
However, I absolutely LOVE singing in particular karaoke, which they don't have much in the US, or at least not the kind that you would find out in East Asia. I love singing by myself in karaoke. It makes me feel like I have a voice. I can sing as loud as I want and sway to the music and it's awesome. Additionally, in some karaoke booths in the US they will bring alcohol to your room too! which is awesome!

I also enjoy East Asian culture and languages very much. Although, I admittedly know less about China; I am much more well-acquainted with Korea and Japan. I don't watch much anime though. Nor do I really play video games much, but as a child found them to be very enjoyable! I loved Pokemon as a kid!

Another think I like to do in my spare time is research psychology and neuroscience articles (you know the free ones that you find online) which is kind of how I found out about the whole aspergers/autism thing in the first place- trying to find solutions to the problem of myself- or I suppose what I perceived as a problem.

gah, sorry for the info-dump.... *__*
**End wall of text**

hi! i am also new here and not quite sure what im doing yet im undiagnosed but i self diagnosed about 7 months ago and since then life has seemed much clearer to me, i started to understand who i was more than i ever have. i was raised by a NT family and autism was a topic that never came up (i never even heard of aspergers until 7 months ago) so life for me was pretty difficult. my family and i were never on the same level and they just always thought i was making excuses for myself or i was just being lazy, they never fully understood that i have legit issues that i actually need help with even though i was diagnosed with ocd, anxiety and depression at a young age. hope you find your way soon enough!

please don't apologize. your post is interesting. i like science, too. i majored in biology in college and am now studying nursing. your graduate level courses sound challenging , but fun.

Hello to you as well!! : )
Oddly, autism was something my mother would vaguely mention... and get very strange about and then say things such as "You might be autistic" followed by "But you're not autistic" ... it's like just pick one already ?
My father never seemed to notice unless it was to point out short-comings such as my delayed/problematic writing/reading/ or speaking or sensory issues which he did not in the slightest understand.
The sensory overload was *ALWAYS* my fault and of course something I did intentionally because I was "an ungrateful spoiled brat".

Anywho, I was never diagnosed with anything, but now that I look at things in hindsight (always 20/20 right) and view my behaviors through an autistic lens, so much makes sense! When I started reading books and such by other autistic adults everything made SO MUCH MORE SENSE.
The more I read about the reasons behind NT logic and small talk the more it finally makes sense! I find when other Aspies explain things I can finally understand what's going on. It's awesome!
Thanks for the shout-out!

OKay, thanks! What made you want to study nursing? I have a cousin that's pursuing nursing! I also have an acquaintance that is interested in phlebotomy. I think that could potentially be very interesting as well; however, I am not very informed about it as a subject.
Sorry if I use a lot of smilies or "Kao-moji" in my writing; I tend to do this because it makes it easier to express how I feel about something and to metaphorically color posts with more emotional valence and nuance, in-particular because it is harder to convey secondary emotion or meaning in text.
Although, I personally find it equally difficult to properly convey myself in person-- but that's another story : ).
And I often go off on long-tangents sooo... I'll stop there.

Welcome to Wrong Planet! There's no need to be nervous, because as you say this is a communal site with a lot of interesting and friendly people. Rather like you. Most of us here can empathise with your situation, so go ahead and post.

If you'd like a chat then just send me a pm.

learning about aspergers and finding yourself in it is a very validating experience. it feels amazing for things to actually start making sense for once. i have never in my life felt normal compared to everyone i have grown up with but i find a normality in aspergers and its comforting. i dont think autism came up in my family because unfortunately my parents were not very open minded and just saw autism as kids who couldnt speak and drooled on themselves or some s**t like that so my mom would tell me that i had no reason to be the way i was. she believed i was just too lazy and she thought i was making an excuse for myself if i told her why i couldnt do a certain thing that most "normal" people wouldnt have a problem doing. im sorry your mom made it very confusing to you and my family would pretty much react like your dad would, they were not there for support, they were just there to point out what i was doing wrong. and then they would wonder why i was never getting better i also had the "spoiled brat" label because i would freak out and get overly upset if i would get overstimulated or if things would change at the last minute or i couldnt continue with a routine. its a very stressful life. and dont get me started on small talk lol..

sorry for the rambling. and i hope everything i say makes sense, its hard for me to get it out even if im typing it..

Hey Unfortunate Aspie welcome.

Oh, that totally makes sense to me! I understand; sometimes my mind just goes in all directions all at once and I find it very difficult to express myself in a coherent and "normal" manner. IRL what ends up happening is that I then talk REALLY REALLY fast, (no matter the language) and then no one understands me and I am forced to repeat. However, I find that there are so many little details that I feel are SUPER IMPORTANT for people to hear about (in order to fully understand the event or idea I am describing- moreover, I LIKE describing those details...) and then by the time I repeat myself ... it seems that people lose interest.... especially with science things. Then other times I speak very haltingly and slowly, almost incoherently, because I become so unsure of what to say in a manner that will make myself understood/interesting to the "average person"... the never-ending struggle.

Parties were literally the bane of my existence growing up! My mom would drag me to these parties and other such events saying it was "good for me" and they would blast horrific music; ugh, the recollection along is terrible lol. I would gnash my teeth and try and find a place to hide until she would take me home.Usually, until I had a full-scale screaming meltdown and became completely anti-social she would refuse to take me home. We both ended up miserable and no one was the better for it : /, but she tried... albeit in a very misguided way.

I too find a normality and comfort from the ASD people in my life I have known. Usually, when people were more high-functioning than I was, I really admired them. I still have to work on the whole self-acceptance part. Difficult to do from my parents' domicile. I also feel a particular kinship with animals and people with other mental disabilities/capabilities, while simultaneously feeling very badly about that because I should be "more normal". However, that route never worked out very well for me...

Thanks for the welcome!

my problem with talking is i have volume control issues. people have to constantly tell me to keep my voice down or speak up because they cant hear me, there is rarely a happy medium. and the more excited i am about what im talking about the louder i get and i dont even realize it. i also tend to talk fast when im talking about something im really excited about. and in typical aspergers fashion i will drone on about the few special interests that i have (mostly cartoons and their voice actors) and i bore people to death. there are one maybe two people in my life that will humor me and at least pretend to listen.

my mom also thought pushing me out of my comfort zone would cure me. if anything it made me worse. shes is very social and can talk to anyone she meets, she loves people and thats the exact opposite of me. she thinks i will be completely cured if i get out of the house and just start talking to random people because thats what "normal" people do. i guess i can say thats how shes tried to help me but i have never improved from it so i dont see how she thinks it does any good, especially when i have meltdowns from being overstimulated. she always tells me to stop being so antisocial like i will just be like, "ohhhh, ok, now i am cured because you told me to stop being that way!" parents..

Yes!! We have very similar mothers lol. She would say this ad nauseum "You need to get out of your comfort zone!! !" "You'll never do anything if you don't get out of your comfort zone!!"
What about if I'm not comfortable anywhere? because of people like you??
Yeah, my family says that my mother could get a doorknob to respond back to her.
Scary thing is, they are probably right! haha.
I never understood how she could be so social!?!
God, then her and the other NT's all just say the same things over and over and just agree or bicker amongst themselves FOR NOTHING!! !
I have tried FOR YEARS DECADES to pass as NT, and in limited social situations in the most superficial way- I can, and be very generally pleasing and pleasant to normal-ish to be around. But it just takes so much effort and I can't go beyond that...
Like if it took me 20+ years just to get down talking about the weather at cocktail parties .... dear god, I don't know if I want to continue any farther than that.
And it doesn't last long this shiny-invincibilty-of-normalcy, soon enough, sure enough, I get tired at the cocktail party of being socially appropriate, forget what comes next in the script, mis-read a cue, or become overwhelmed by the sensory input... then it's over. I go back to being the weird-o that likes strange stuff whom people just kind of tolerate and puzzle over.
I'm very good with scripted stuff though! That I can do very well.