I guess I'll introduce myself

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First off, I totally intend to respect the forum as "your place/space" and if I'm doing anything wrong, please tell me to stop.

I think I somehow (don't really remember how I first got here) started reading here back in 2011 or so. I was just waffling between the "neurotypical" and "not sure if I have it" options when registering, since neither fit. I went with the "not sure" option even though I'm pretty sure I'm nothing diagnosable, but if I were neurotypical, I probably wouldn't have stuck around so long. If anything, I would probably get social anxiety, but that's gotten better recently after I mostly got out of a situation with people harassing me a few months ago.

Yeah, my screen name is BAP_Buddy, and I'm sorry if that's stupid. It's supposed to reference "Broad Autism Phenotype", I guess meaning the gene-d people in between social personalities and the autism spectrum. "Buddy", I guess came from thinking it's going to be a new year soon, and I wanted to try to start a little more socializing, and replying on a forum might make me a few friends. And the alliteration is nice.

I'd say I have a more practical/logical mindset than a social one, and don't really have that much energy/ability when it comes to dealing with people. Although I'm probably not the best at helping people, I really don't believe (or completely understand) in picking on others, because that only makes life/a job/etc. harder, and of course would hurt the recipient.

I probably have the brain/neurology that I was born with, but a good amount of external factors have contributed to my situation. I grew up with one parent (other died when I was fairly young) in a quasi-rural area outside of the town I went to school at, and is/was an only child, so I pretty much had my own ways of doing things early on without a lot of outside interference. I ended up getting my first job when I was 19, almost 20, despite trying to apply for jobs throughout middle/high school. Which was a summer job for too many years at the local cheap, falling-apart amusement park, and had to then try to get full-time jobs between the summers that unemployment had me stuck there. I've had a few classes in things, but not having much money means not paying for much education, so even though having time not working would've been ideal for classes, that didn't happen. I ended up volunteering at a soup kitchen during my off times (I would bring a milk jug or some fruit in sometimes), but ended up dealing with condescending society people (once even dealing with a crack about me not having a cell phone at the time(!)), so I slipped out of that once I did get my first full time job at 26. I've been working at cleaning at the local hospital for almost 3 years (I'm 29 as I write this), mostly in the SCU and ICU units, so I mostly have sleeping or unconscious people to work around and don't have to talk much, haha.

Anyhow, I do/did grow up in a poorer area (and still live with my parent), but I am thankful for the fact that I at least always had a roof over my head and never had issues with affording food or medical needs. My best friend (same age as me) has a learning disability with numbers/counting that wasn't really helped by the school system, so she doesn't work other than occasional babysitting and selling Avon. I only bring that up to show the point that I'm not hanging around society types, not that I think people's jobs or how much money/stuff/status they have is what their value is. Unfortunately, having friends without much money does mean that I am more socially isolated, since I don't get to go out and do much with them. But yes, I am definitely thankful that I do have a few true friends that stick with you when things go wrong and aren't all about status.

Also have a parent I get along with, and the rest of my family/relatives aren't super-close (bond-wise, not too far in distance), but we get along, don't fight, and help each other out now and again. The one relationship I sort of had was asking someone out online in the summer of 2002. They told me yes, then disappeared for a few months, and when confronted, said they weren't in love with me, but just didn't want to hurt me (?!). I'm a heterosexual/heteroromantic female, but haven't had too many guys show interest in me (secret lesbians can't seem to be able to leave me alone, though!)

Wow, this was awesome getting all this off my chest; I don't get to talk to anyone about problems much. At this point, I'm not sure if it matters if anyone reads all this; I was just glad to type it all out. Anyway, hopefully I'll be able to contribute around here, and I'll try to keep in mind that my circumstances aren't necessarily the same as everyone else's.

Welcome to WP!

Hey BAP_Buddy welcome.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Hi BAP_Buddy. I just joined. Just became aware of Asperger's last week. So much to take in. Maybe I'll see ya around in the forums.

welcome to the site

hi. welcome. you are articulate.

I'm in a pretty similar spot - find gig > avoid boredom/NTs > suburban doldrums > life... Beats the alternative of squirreling myself away in a server room and letting people predicate their whole ideal of me on cash. By U.S.A. standards I live really light, for some time now, good coffee has been all that's necessary for me to maintain order usually. Associating directly with friends in the modern age takes a lot of patience but having something to do all day really helps.

Wow, that's a long intro. Welcome to WP, I hope you enjoy the forum.

It's funny, I am in a similar situation, I only have one parent. Well the other is still alive, but they're dead to me. I also am not close to my extended family too, even though they live nearby. I also had an online relationship in which they stopped caring about me and "left". It's funny when you see people with experiences similar to your own :3

Your screen name isn't dumb imo, mine has a pretty dry meaning too.

Thanks, everyone, for all the welcoming!

Having a not-so-easy time speaking in person (quiet voice, not always able to get my thoughts into words, nerves, etc.), that's a touching compliment to receive!



Thanks, that was something that had been building up for years, so that was a long time coming.



I actually know someone that had a long-distance online relationship in which they had met and flown to each other's homes a few times (it lasted for a few years) that ended when the other person MARRIED someone in their home area, without telling her. She ended up finding out after trying and trying to contact him after he disappeared for a while.

Whoa there interwebs... Tisk tisk...
I guess I'm doing something right considering I haven't known anybody to get married covertly!