Hi, I'm dyspraxic

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Hi there. I'm 16, female, from the UK. I was diagnosed with dyspraxia when I was about 10. I have co-ordination problems, but I also have social problems. I didn't have any close friends till I moved schools due to bullying when I was 13, now I have a number of close friends but I find it difficult to socialise with large groups of people. I've got better, but when I'm in a situation where I'm with people who aren't close friends, they tend to gang up on me and I don't like that. I have problems with making eye contact with people because I often don't notice if someone's trying to get my attention. I can't lip read and I'm not great at body language. I can be friends with people if they understand this though. I hate flashing lights and music with a heavy beat like club dance music, and any kind of repetitive noise or actions.

I generally get on better with people online, because I'm a fast typer, and I have problems talking coherantly in real life. I am very interested in music, I play the guitar, although not great, but I enjoy it, I listen to a lot of rock/punk/emo/indie/ska kinda music, and I like discussing music. I go to weekly boarding school. Erm, that's about it: that's me

What exactly is...that thing you have?

The damn name is so hard to pronounce!

"Dis-prak-see-a" lol. It's kinda like some of the social problems you have, but milder, and a lot of co-ordination problems.

I dont think i have ever heard of that. I looked it up and some of those sypmtomes do sound familer. so this is on the spectrum too?
I relate to alot of what you say too.

how do you like your school? I went to a boarding school and I think it messed me up more. I did not really care for it much.

Yeah, it's apparently on the spectrum.

I find that boarding helps me, because I enjoy being around my friends more than my family. I get bored easily at home and very lonely, and I didn't really like the schools or the people in this area anyway. I had some issues at first with organisation and stuff, but I've been boarding nearly 4 years now and it's changed me a lot. I like being able to see friends all the time. I don't like boarding school food, or the forced rules and routine, or the lack of personal space (I have my own room, but I've seen bigger broom cupboards). Generally though, it has benefitted me, particularly being in a more accepting school and having some help for special needs.

I went to 2 different boarding schools the first I went to for 2 years and the second I was at for 4. the first one I always had a room mate. the second one I did most of the time but not all the time. I didnt do well with room mates, I really like haveing my own space. I got in alot of touble at school. being there was real hard for me. I am out of school and trying to work on getting my life together. I am 23 years old. I have a real hard time makeing friends too. I do hope to talk to you more. maybe we could be online frinds.


Jessica

Wow, a school that offers room and board? I've always wanted to be in a boarding school. Only rich people get those around here though. It just seems like the best way to learn and grow, especially for an aspie. You are there, immersed, focused, not having to deal with other issues crowding in. No need to pack for a full day without any haven or shelter. No need to worry about catching the bus, or leaving the house half an hour early. No worries about getting hurt on the way through heavy traffic. You're just there, and if you're lucky your fellow boarders will be more study oriented, involved in assignments, and less distracting from The Goal as family or non-student roommates would be.

Of course if you're unlucky like me, your only experience with boarding lands you on the floor that empties nightly as everyone besides yourself leaves for the alcoholic etc frat parties. And your roommate is a spoiled rich kid who listens to Heroin Fiend Metal music that can be heard 3 floors away (no joke), and tells you studying isn't allowed in your room. But even I agree that that semester/university/dormitory/floor/roommate combination was definitely not the average experience. If I had the money I would surely give it another try.

There are some great things about boarding, but some not so good ones.
Bad things:
terrible food
living to a timetable
being kept awake by other people
tiny showers with no temperature adjustment
really hard to get online - 5 shared computers
not much freedom - need permission to go out. at home my parents don't care where I go or what I do.
not having any friends nearby in the holidays
set times to do homework, 2 hours a night when I have to be in my room (although I bend this rule)

Good things:
being able to talk to my friends
now I'm old enough to go out in the evenings
the food is bad, but I can eat it with my friends
only see my family at weekends, so we get on better
only travelling twice a week (although I travel by bus and train alone, so it wasn't easy at first)
being able to go to sleep whenever I don't have classes.

So, yeah, it's pretty good. I keep myself busy when I'm at school in the evenings, or else it gets boring. When I'm not working, I go running on the school field with a friend, or listen to music with another friend, or play my guitar. It's very different to my life at home. It's also helped me to get organised, to make sure I take the right things home at weekends and having to do everything for myself. I think boarding is alright if you get your own room, because I didn't have my own room for 2 years, and they kept moving me around, I was moving room every week for various reasons and it was really unsettling. But otherwise, it's good.

My parents always say that boarding school is where people drug you up and restrain you 24/7...and they're threatening to send me there.

Welcome, unspoken.

When my child was 10 he was dx'ed as having apraxia (as dyspraxia is called in the US). Latter that was changed to PDD-NOS, as the social piece became more noticeable. I don't beleive dyspraxia per se is considered "on the spectrum" but I might be wrong. There certainly is a large overlap if it isn't.

I'm glad you found this board and I look forward to "talking" with you more.

BeeBee

For those not familiar with dyspraxia/apraxia I have posted the following answer to a FQA from the apraxia-kids.com site.

"Q.What do you mean he has dyspraxia?
A. Dyspraxia means difficulty with learned patterns of movement in the absence of damage to the muscles or the nerves. When different people talk about dyspraxia, you'd think they would all be talking about the same thing. However, that does not always seem to be the case. As a term, it is used by a range of professionals but to refer to rather different conditions. "

I agree that dyspraxia isn't on the autism spectrum. It shares some of the motor planning/coordination problems people on the spectrum have, but it's not an ASD. Dyspraxia doesn't include, per say, social, communication, sensory, absoption, organizational/planning, and abstract imaginative differences that are common to the spectrum. The "praxia" in dyspraxia is Latin for planning (in this case, motor planning) and the dys is a Latin root for inability or not. Taken together, they suggest an inability (or impairment) in planning motor skills.

yes 171 that is what my school was like.

here are thebad things I experienced.

Bed food (but some was good)
Not being taught live skills.
haveing to deal with my room mates Granmal seizures and stayin a roomall night were she was haveing uncontroled diarea because the staff didnt want her left alone. (SEND HER TO THE HOSPITAL!)
dealing with teachers that tell you who you can and cant be friends with
dealing with the fact that if one person knows someinht about you every one does, if one person hates you they all do.
getting restraind
being given drug after daug that doesnt work and haveing real bad reactions to them
being sent to the hospital
internet almost none existnt. once in a great while getting to use a computer at the library
not aloud to have a computer in your room
can only go out side if you stay where staff can see you.
haveing some one tell you how much you are aloud to eat and how much you have to eat.
coming home from a trip to the mall to find that they have moved all your stuff into a different room with a different room mate.
haveing to do everything with your doem mates and only getting to see your other friends for one to two hours aday out side of school and not at all on some days.
not being able to meet other people in the comunity.
being told when you have to go to bed and when you have to get up
not much of an art class, no music to speek of
gevery time I had an out burst they would say I had just done it to get atention.
haveing a room mate that sets you off on porpous and the staff do nother about it.
getting in trouble for ecolalia and copying movement (said i was teasing people, did it without thinking)
being told when you can eat.
not aloud to have snacks in your room.
dont really ever see any of the friends Idid make there because r they live in different states.
the whole school fosuing more on behavior and stuff and not doing much good school work.
only getting to see my parents during vacations

Good things-
.........I'll have to get back to you on that one.

what I have posted above is mostly from my second school http://www.pathwayschool.org/ this is there web site. the first one I went to wasnt so bad.

I really enjoyed boarding school.

Much better than getting beat up at a public school.

witch boarding school did you go to? I know some arnt asbad as the one I went to. I just did not do well

You probably have a mom who's a Hitler clone just like I do.

no my mom loves me very much and I love her. she hated the school too, I sort of got stuck there I was too old with to many behavior problems to go to a better school