but you don't look autistic

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After reaching a point of not caring anymore and full acceptance of HFA/ASP, it was too late. At times I've heard "but you don't look autistic", I respond with "what is it supposed to look like?". NTs that respond this way having zero knowledge about ASD except for the appearance of an ASD level-3. (In the current research, there are some facial features common to 2 ASD subtypes, facial subtype 1 & 2 -epicanthal folds are one but not totally a rule). But why get into deeper subject-matter with NTs that have no knowledge about this and really don't care.

I wish I would have known about other people like me from a young age, instead of being forced into the NT world, being isolated, feeling and being totally alone. Nobody understood, nobody cared. I've been called: idiot, stupid, moron, weird, and the list goes on. I have nothing truly in common with NTs. (AQ: 47/50, ASP/HFA 190/200)

The deepest meaningful interactions are with other ASD people. I don't have to overexplain, I don't seem weird, I am free to express interests without seeming boring to a NT. I met a post-doc PsyD who after many conversations was glad that I talked with them because I could keep up in every subject in discussion, in depth. With NTs I would fail miserably, get made fun of and hurt, lose energy, and have to gain energy & courage to go out and try to be normal again. Done with that.

I embrace the weirdness

I'm not so sure about this. I have known of two sets of identical twins where one was autistic and the other wasn't. It wasn't facial structure that set them apart as that was the same. It was the difference in facial expressions. That's what an actor is going to work on when playing a character with autism.

I've known quite a few autistic people who happen to look "totally normal."

Their autism is in their outward behavior, not their physical appearance.

Yeah, there is a STUDY of facial subtypes but it is not a rule. A lot of ASD appear "normal". I get that. Personally, instead of not remembering faces like some do, I have extreme awareness. I can remember someone I met 25 yrs ago by face. The facial features are not a list but differing attributes. I also recognize patterns and small differences to an unusual degree.

As I said, I have a hard time explaining myself, also usually the entirety of a topic, missing fine details.

I heard the Han Asperger observed that the people he described as quite beautiful, Leo Kanner made the same observation independently.

I been ask about the same question.I was tested real late in life 70's and the 1st time came back autism so had a hard time accepting it.I was retested result was middle of the row autism.I've had several problems growing up somewhat stimm was never at the top of my class in school the test show me somewhat below aver.I love to read about the 2nd ww.I sometimes pace love alone time once in awhile have meltdowns.My wife helps me to adjust and keep things going also I been incontinent for 30yrs.