Asperger's later in life

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Hello all,

I'm a US middle-aged guy who finally, around 12/2021, realized that I have Asperger's Syndrome. I've been reading up on it, including Tony Attwood's books, and find that the majority of AS traits fit me perfectly.

If only school staff knew, decades ago, how to identify it - I and other would've been saved a lifetime of struggles that younger folks didn't have. But its ok! So, I want to finish some self-education before deciding whether to get formally diagnosed. Anyone with feedback on the good/bad of it later in life - I would appreciate!

I don't want diagnosis to negatively affect my job or ability to promote or change careers. But I do want some professional acknowlgedment of who I am and why I'm like this.

No more do I think "Ignorance is bliss" in wanting to pretend that its not me. We may be honest to a fault, but don't be foolish in trusting people. I've learned alot, and could maybe in time be a mentor to others here.

Thanks for listening.

Yes, you came to the right place. Plenty of good advice here and others looking advice from experienced aspies like us. All that suffering in school made us tough enough to go out into a world which doesn't understand us, but is happy to have someone with our skills.

It is a revelation to meet people like us both here and IRL, and be able to be open about who we are. Of course, all my life I have been around others aspies, just not openly autistic ones. From the start of school I was puzzled by a kid with a loud, hyperactive type of ASD. I was the quiet, less hyperactive type. But I noticed people treated both of us the same due to our oddities.

Welcome aboard.

I am an old Aspie, maybe even an ancient Aspie. That is because I existed before they even came up with the word. I didn't even know I was one until very late in life. That explains many of the problems I encountered during life.

I might make one point. I am different than most people but I have many rare distinct advantages. Aspies possess a plus side that in a way almost makes us Superman.

So expand your pluses and use them to compensate for your weaknesses. And you will generally do fine.

Welcome to WP! No matter what diagnosis you end up with, or even if you decide not to get one, your interest in the topic means you belong here!

I was diagnosed Autism Spectrum Disorder, Level 1 (Mild), shortly before my 65^th birthday. I'd already been happily retired for almost ten years at that point so I did not have to worry about professional complications (that was nice). The benefit of my diagnosis was that it explained so much of my life. Things finally made sense! Because of my age it was not a warning of problems ahead of me but rather an explanation of the problems behind me.

So far I've found no practical use for my diagnosis. Of course, I got it right before the Pandemic so me and my diagnosis haven't gotten out much. I have shared it with my medical providers—who nod politely, don't ask for written documentation, and don't seem to care.

One clear practical use is now, when my bride bumps up against one of my Aspie traits, I get to say:

>=>=>=>=>"I have a doctor's note for that!"

This amuses me much more than it amuses her.

I'll guess that if you are on the Spectrum then yours is Mild, like mine. After my bride and I researched it we both believed I was likely a "High Functioning Autistic" but we couldn't be certain—the traits fit me but it was unclear whether I was ALMOST on the Spectrum or SLIGHTLY on the Spectrum. It wasn't clear. I sought the diagnosis so I could be sure, rather than feeling obligated to always say "We think...."

What tipped the balance for me enough that I pursued a formal diagnosis was this:

>=>https://psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient

My score on it convinced me I wasn't imagining things. If you haven't already found this quiz you might find it interesting.

Since then I've also discovered this:

>=>https://rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php ^{Registering is optional!}

which you might also find interesting.

welcome, diagnosed at age 68, Today I am 70 and doing better than ever before. its never too late. glad you are with us.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks all for the replies.

My RAADS score is 117 with 65 the threshold for suspected ASD. Language is close to normal with pretty much everything else off the charts. I've gotta learn the lingo/acronyms of these tests and do a proper signature, ha.

Any tips for finding a provider to diagnose? Attwood has a link I used but the listings seem to be mostly (for the US) in the Boston area. They are of course hard to find. I understand its not usually covered by insurance? Even so, I would consider it an investment for the peace of mind of knowing.

I have a feeling these types of clinics may be overrun by people with urgent needs since the Covid quarantines - is ASD diagnosis/support getting the same level of attention in the past two years...

I had a formal diagnosis two years ago at the age of 60.

I'd self identified many years earlier but kept it to myself.

As regards the impact that a formal identification would have, including confirmation on my NHS health record and disclosure to my employer, family and (very small) circle of acquaintances and friends - I was surprised at how positive this was and continues to be. For example it prompted my two daughters to reflect further on their differences and subsequently identify as being neurodiverse and in the case of my youngest daughter seek a formal diagnosis for my eldest grandson.

To repeat the well worn trope - my life now makes sense.

Good luck with it all.

Check your insurance. It might include coverage for mental health and an Adult Autism Assessment should qualify. But double-check stuff...

My healthcare insurance provider's web site said mental health was covered and further seemed to imply I did not need a referral for it...I could go straight to an appropriate provider, get an assessment, and it would be covered. I decided to be cautious, though, so I called them and the representative on the phone said I would have to get a referral request from my primary care provider (PCP). That didn't seem to match the web page so I called more than once...and sometimes I was told I needed a referral request from my PCP, sometimes I was told I did not need that.

I opted to be cautious and got a referral request through my PCP. (I found it interesting she didn't challenge or question the request, she promptly submitted the request...I'm not sure what to make of that.) The insurance company promptly sent me a referral and I called the designated provider...and they said they did not do Adult Autism Assessments!

I called the insurance company again and got more useless referrals. Finally they said I could find someone to do the assessment and they would write a referral accordingly. All they insisted was that the provider had to be a licensed psychologist with ABA certification.

That turned out to be difficult to find! After a few months of searching someone with ABA certifications explained to me that ABA certification was for treating Autism but was not needed to do an Adult Autism Assessment. They said all I needed was a licensed psychologist to do the assessment.

That made things much easier! https://www.findapsychologist.org allowed me to search for psychologists near me, my state's web site for licensing psychologist's allowed me to verify licensing, and the psychologists' web pages typically told me whether they worked with Autism and with patients as old as me.

What those resources did not tell me was whether the psychologist would do an Adult Autism Assessment for someone my age. I figure there must not be many calls for that so they don't bother mentioning it on their web page. Finding that out required calling them and asking.

When I called the nearest practice the call was answered by their office manager...who didn't believe they did Adult Autism Assessments but said she would verify that. I got a callback telling me that, indeed, one of their psychologists could do my assessment! I guess the assessments must be infrequent enough that even the practice's staff doesn't know they can do them!!

I kept records and submitted them to the insurance company for reimbursement. I got partial reimbursement because I had gone outside the insurance company's network.

With hindsight, I suspect the following:
>=>- I could've gone straight to an in-network provider for the assessment.
>=>- There were no suitable in-network providers near me.
>=>- So, I had to go off-network and was therefore told to get a request from my PCP.
>=>- Because I was off-network, I only got partial reimbursement.

But...since the insurance company phone reps were wrong about what kind of provider I needed no one (not me and not the insurance company) checked to see if there was an in-network provider with the correct credentials near me. Who knows, if I had gotten correct information from the insurance company I might have found an in-network provider.

P.S. Most autism assessments are performed on children. That made the assessment somewhat amusing. I thought it was kind of fun!

Appreciate all of your feedback. Getting diagnosed sounds difficult, but worth it depending on our own situation.

Random aspie complaint: navigating a parking lot at night full of idling vehicles with their lights on, blinding me from all directions. Arrgh! Never happened before the advent of cell phones. Light sensitivity ya know.

Hi. I recall a Temple Grandin video where she shares some thoughts on the positives and negatives of getting a clinical diagnosis. I think Temple was talking specifically about folks based in the USA.

From my own family experience I can say that a diagnosis for a child may in later life limit the jobs that they can take. I know that for a grandchild (now young adult) it was necessary to get the diagnosis revoked so the youngster could get their dream job. Just sayin'.

Cheers Brett.