20 Aug 2007, 4:54 pm
I joined this community in order to get help from adults and kids that have personal experience with Asperger's syndrome. My 17year old step-son was diagnosed about 6 months ago. We got the IEP, and all of the paperwork...and then it seems to have come to a screeching hault. He doesn't believe he has aspergers, and he won't accept our help. He really doesn't seem to want to try any help that's available. How do we get through to him without making him feel more miserable than he already does??????? We want to help him, not hurt him...he has had enough of that in 17 years of life.
20 Aug 2007, 5:13 pm
Sometimes it takes time. I have AS, as does my 20 year old daughter. We look at it as an explanation, not as a "condition". When your son is ready, he'll look at this. If dealing with other kids I've known has given me any insight, it's that you don't push a 17 year old anywhere or they'll dig in their heels and the situation will be worse than before. You might have to just back way off, Mom, and let him come to grips with his life. Good luck!
richie
Supporting Member
Joined: 9 Jan 2007
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 30,142
Location: Lake Whoop-Dee-Doo, Pennsylvania
20 Aug 2007, 5:29 pm
Welcome to WrongPlanet 
He needs to arrive at the truth about himself by himself, he is still at that "I know everything age"
a few hard knocks might change his perspective.
20 Aug 2007, 5:49 pm
21 Aug 2007, 2:18 am
AnonymousAnonymous
Veteran
Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 74,008
Location: Portland, Oregon
21 Aug 2007, 2:32 pm
21 Aug 2007, 2:34 pm
21 Aug 2007, 4:47 pm
Hello and welcome, Lisaloo! I am currently raising 3 teenage sons. The oldest (16) and youngest (13) both have Asperger's and the middle one's brain has gone on an adolescent vacation (he is NT). Nan, is right, at 17 odds are good he isn't going to listen to much you have to say and he will do what he wants regardless. The best we can do is be patient, watchful and there to listen when life's lessons happen. I know it is hard to watch them shun what would help them, but that is all you can do. My oldest son tries to deal with his weaknesses head on and better himself. My youngest son is all about being "cool" and admitting he has AS is not cool to him at the moment. I have days when I would like to force him to listen to me, but he would just rebel. I would lose him completely so I watch and I wait. Most of them grow up, eventually!! 
