Wow... And I thought I was just a loser

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Greetings, all…

I'm David, a 32-year-old guy in New York City who works for an architecture firm while going to school. (Chorus: "Hi, David.")

A recent series of failed social encounters and some comments on another discussion board I frequent led me to read up a little on Asperger’s on Wikipedia, and I was slightly shocked (but not really surprised) to discover that I felt like I was reading my own life history. I’ve never been officially diagnosed, but everything seems to fit. It would certainly explain a lot.

I have a full-time job and a few NT friends, and I can usually pass for NT myself if you don’t pay too much attention, but I’ve always had problems with social situations and relationships. More than once I’ve been told that “you don’t seem comfortable in your own skin”, or that I give off some sort of creepy stalker/rapist/serial murderer vibe without meaning to. As you might imagine, I also struggle a lot with clinical depression. I have a few weird interests that can sometimes border on obsession, but I usually manage to keep things in check in order not to freak out my friends.

Anyway, I’m sure I’ll be sharing more of my life story later, but for now I wanted to say I’m glad I finally found this place, and I’m looking forward to meeting new people and learning new things.

I guess my first question would be: Okay, so I'm pretty sure I might have Asperger's. What now? What next steps should I be taking?

Peace,

David

Welcome David, I just joined too

I also found here through wikipedia and I understand what you mean about reading your life story

Have you considered getting diagnosed offically?

Nice to meet you, David.

Hey david, welcome to wp, im from jersey, and my brother works in manhatten so im very familiar with ny, anyways if u want to find out more if u think u have aspergers, why don't u take the online test---> http://www.rdos.net/eng/Aspie-quiz.php

Hi newbies and welcome to planet wrong.

where do you go from here? depends what you want. it took me three years to accept that i actually have this condition (i thought i was just unusual, you know) so you may do a bit of 'denial' time. it's good to verify that you actually have AS rather than some other 'oddball' condition and you can find that out here, by the little everyday things we experience that set us apart from others.

i think i put some effort into understanding the condition and how it affects others and how they will perceive me differently, it helps to bridge the 'gap'.

some people want official dx'es, some don't. i had some speech therapy because i realised my voice tone was flat. it's up to you. you can just hang around here if you like. that's what most of us do.

Hi David,

Welcome to WP.

RDOS isn't a good way to diagnose yourself. Anyone could get a high score on it because of their eating disorder, brain damage, depression, personality disorders, etc. Very few NTs score aspie on it.


To know for sure if you have it, I'd go and try to find a doctor who knows about AS. You can start out by asking on here where can you go in NY in your city to see if you have AS or not. I don't think a diagnoses is really important for you since you have a job and seem to be doing very well. You can go and see someone who specializes AS in adults and in they say you have it, there you go. I think that's all you need.

Thanks for the welcome, everybody.

I just took the quiz:

w00t, I guess.

I wouldn't mind talking to a professional, if only just to confirm my own self-diagnosis. I could probably also use some counseling in terms of how to deal with relationships, as that's been a major problem of mine lately.

Hi David! Hi Kolin!

Welcome to WP. I'll essentially echo what Postperson already said. When I took the Baron-Cohen quiz a few years ago, I just laughed at my high result because I thought that "Asperger's" was a kind of mental retardation and I knew I wasn't ret*d. Even when I looked it up at the time I just thought, "Oh, isn't it funny that this description sounds like me!" and then I tossed the notion aside. It wasn't until my son started showing signs of autism and I found WP that I was ready to admit how well the symptoms of AS match up with me and my experiences. When I first made this realization, I was excited to meet so many people who have so much in common with me, but once the novelty wore off, I sunk into a depression. I was terrified as I made realization after realization about just how weird I am and how many of my difficulties stemmed from my AS traits. I felt like my world had turned upside down, in spite of the relief that this knowledge brought. My closest relatives say that I was pretty unbearable during that stage. I had to become accountable and start figuring out how to "bridge the gap" as Postperson says. Knowing about AS has made me more self-conscious and more aware of what I'm doing, which is both good and bad. In the end, though, I think it has brought a higher level of quality and to my life and I'm glad to know about it.

I don't have an official diagnosis. There's no doubt in my mind what it would be. The only times I ever feel like I'd like one is when people start spouting off about "fake" aspies. In those moments, I'd like to be able to pull out my credentials. I've thought sometimes that I might benefit from special accomodations at college but I think I've taught myself enough coping skills that it shouldn't be necessary.

I hope you get as much out of WP as I have. Make yourselves at home.

Welcome to WrongPlanet!
I myself am from Long Island, yeah I'm self diagnosed and people used to think I was the UNA-Bomber
back in the day. Here I found friends and a community.

I was

141 of 200 AS
70 of 200 NT

Aspie gold star for me then

My Aspie score: 155 of 200
My neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 49 of 200
I am very likely an Aspie

Hi!

I never knew anything about autism other than remembering rainman...

but i found out about it by reading an article out in my lab's reading lounge... it had lots of narratives and i just felt dumbstruck.

i had also recently started teaching for a TA in college and suddenly... all those comments on my behavior from teaching evaluations came together...

Hi David,

My experience has been similar to yours. AS explains alot. I haven't felt much need for a real diagnosis, but I have read a few books on it, which was enlightening. Just knowing what it is has been a great relief. I wouldn't go overboard telling everyone, often it only confuses things. Most people don't know what Aspergers is about. Not even my mom gets it completely, and she's a certified councelor.

BTW, my brother is an architect in NY (I think he has Asperger's too).

Hi David,

welcome to WP.

Wow, another person who has been said to give off a creepy vibe! I was accused of being a serial killer in high school. Of course, i HAD to play on it haha.

Anyway...I hope you enjoy posting here.

I have always thought myself mostly human, only recently learned why. What I have learned is, I am really stubborn at being me, and other people at being them.

What worked for me was seeing others as defective machines, that if I spent some time tinkering with them I could make them work enough for me to get by. Find out what makes them happy, and act for them.

The other choice, solving all the world's problems, I am saving for later.

All people have Autism, it is just a matter of degree. Your field is loaded, an Aspie Preserve, so you should blend in.

That social stuff is trickey, and when I ask them to explain it, they seem to have never thought of it.

I am sure there are books on passing for human, I just never cared that much.

At the top of the page there is, Books.