11 Jan 2009, 3:45 am
Hello, people.
Bounced around the forums here a few days and decided to pipe up.
I don't know if I place anywhere on the spectrum. I'm clearly not in the NT camp. But I'm not as far into the AS camp as some of the regular posters. I already had a diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder, but haven't sought out one regarding ASD (I already suspected my depression is co-morbid with something, but never been able to put a finger on it).
I was aware of autism years ago (from paper encyclopedias), and I was aware of AS a few years ago when mentioned in an interview of someone suspected of having/displaying AS, like many other... er... enthusiastic computer programmers (among whom I count myself). I keep seeing some of the traits in me, with emphasis on "some", which has caused me basically to go into denial. Dunno what I'm afraid of, though, but clearly fear is an element involved.
I have been called "socially awkward" directly and explicitly to my face (thankfully!). I also clearly remember thinking there was some "secret language" going on between other people that I couldn't quite "see", nor figure out. And an overwhelming recurring thought has been one along the lines of "I don't fit in anywhere". Been wandering around in forums and real life trying to find where, or if, I can fit in, where I don't feel like an odd fixture hastily glued on to the side of somewhere. I wonder if this forum is my final destination, or will be just another stepping stone.
Here's to hope, which for me keeps dying and resurrecting randomly. 
11 Jan 2009, 3:57 am
11 Jan 2009, 6:06 am
11 Jan 2009, 7:37 am
Nice to meet you, PhaethonH. 
richie
Supporting Member
Joined: 9 Jan 2007
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 30,142
Location: Lake Whoop-Dee-Doo, Pennsylvania
11 Jan 2009, 11:26 am
To WrongPlanet!! !
11 Jan 2009, 11:51 am
11 Jan 2009, 11:58 am
