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Hi, I'm Dave, 39 from UK. All my life I have felt as though I live on a separate plane to everyone else. I feel as though I'm on the outside looking in at everyone else. I look at others and ask myself "Why do people talk so much to each other?" and "What do they find to talk about?" I think some people like my sister cannot go 30 seconds without having to say something. I could go the rest of my life without speaking to anyone.

I do not have friends outside work, nor do I feel I need any. I have been told in the past that I ignore people because I don't speak to them. I avoid conversation as I usually find that my brain switches off and I just want the person to go away.

I was married for ten years, but poor communication skills and the increasing need to be alone led to the end of the marriage. I have 3 children and feel closer to them than I do to anyone else (including my parents).

I have been living alone for just over two years. I do get lonely, but enjoy my own company & my familiar routines. The physical energy needed to ask someone out would be too great & I am scared of rejection.

I think that I would have got an AS diagnosis as a child has it been known about then. Looking at some of the characteristics of AS, I can see that some of them have reduced over the years, but I still have hardly any communication skills and will forever be on the outside looking in.

Welcome to WP, Dave, although I'm speaking for myself, because I'm not the official greeter or a room mod, or anything like that.

People here are sometimes quiet, but for the most part, they talk a lot...or type a lot.....

I used to feel the same way you do, but I grew out of it, and my wife still speaks to me.

Try the chatroom. Interesting people.

BTDT
Rafe Serebreny

Welcome, and may I be the first to say.....Nanoo,Nanoo

Yep, welcome to Wrong Planet, Mork from Ork.

Hi Mork:

"Gabba gabba, we accept you! One of us, one of us!"

Feeling like an outsider is very common. I felt that for years. It wasn't until I went to college that I found people that I could really communicate with. I don't see most of those folks anymore since I moved from Maryland to California, and I feel very isolated sometimes and not wanting to talk to people. Thank God I have Jennifyr.

Small talk is something that's taken me years to understand and emulate, and I'm still working to master its intricacies. As GroovyDruid mentioned in one of his articles, so much of it is non-verbal: facial expressions, tones of voice, body language. In "Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy" by the late Douglas Adams, one of the alien characters speculated on reasons why humans talk so bloody much. One of his theories was that if they didn't, their jaws would clamp shut. His other theory was that if they didn't, all those words would accumulate in their brains until their heads exploded.

Welcome! You've got friends!
Andrew

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"Perhaps I was on the wrong planet born?"--Albert Einstein {sic}
(from Robert Anton Wilson's novel Masks of the Illuminati
"We're on the third mall from the sun."--Bill Hicks [R.I.P.]