Another newbie introduction

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Greetings, everyone! My name is James, I’m 34 years old, and I live outside of Seattle, WA (USA) with my lovely wife and daughter. Where to start? Well, I haven’t been officially diagnosed with Asperger’s, but from the moment I first read a description of it, I was all but certain that it was talking about me! I *have* been diagnosed with depression and Borderline Personality Disorder – but that’s a whole different discussion for a different time...

Here’s a (very) short version of my life to this point: I grew up as an only child and had tremendous difficulty making friends. My parents were (and are) loving and well-intentioned, but they were often overprotective, even oppressive at times. I breezed through high school with an A-minus average, only applying myself in the subjects that interested me (math, music, and foreign languages) – with the rest, I did enough to get by, and nothing more. I majored in music composition in college, a degree with which I’ve done exactly nothing to date (though I have cultivated an obsession with anything related to classical music!) I’ve never had a real career, just a succession of jobs – currently I’m in the software industry, and the work usually doesn’t do much for me. But I'm trying very hard to love it and get passionate about it...

I met my wife in college, right before I turned 21 – my first, and to this date only, relationship. It’s been a tumultuous 13 years – she should be nominated for sainthood for putting up with me for so long! Yet she’s the only person who comes close to ‘getting’ me and has been with me every step along my road to self-acceptance. Our 3½ year old daughter was recently diagnosed with Asperger’s – I am fervently hoping we can have another child so my daughter doesn’t have to grow up with the loneliness and isolation that I experienced as an ‘only’. And it’s really because of her that I’m here – in the hope that by accepting and better understanding my own condition, I can help her accept and better understand hers. There is much more knowledge and support available now than when I was growing up, and I want to take full advantage of it.

Thank you, and I'm looking forward to checking out this site in more detail!

To WrongPlanet!! !

Hello and welcome to the wonderful world that is wrongplanet!

My Aspergerhood has also been recently identified -- I am 43. (I don't use the term "diagnosed", because that would be like saying that a certain dog has been "diagnosed" as being a Border Collie.) School was easy for me too (except for maths, but I can write software formulas to do my sums for me), and I have had a variety of jobs, from freelance writer/cartoonist to Web designer and now Project Management lecturer.

I am a fan of Mozart, Rachmaninov, Bach, Wagner, one or two indie rock groups and a number of other genres.

In a way I am glad I never knew I had Aspergers before; but your daughter has an advantage over someone like me who at this advanced age is now for the first time receiving the help I have needed many times in the past to manage outbursts of rage. I am reading books written for parents of schoolchildren and "translating" the advice to fit an adult situation. I work with a colleague who has ADHD (which I have too) and who at the age of 25 is in many ways emotionally more mature than I am. All because her parents realised it when she was young, and raised her accordingly.

Glad you found this place

Greetings, and welcome aboard the Wrong Planet, fellow-traveler James.

Welcome to Wrong Planet!

Thanks for the warm welcomes, everyone!

Alphabetania - I am hoping that knowing Simone (our daughter) has AS at such an early age will help us, as you say, raise her accordingly. She has seen two of the top pediatric neurologists in the area, who both concur about AS, and she is also seeing two therapists. Progress has been slow, but tangible and encouraging - and I know my understanding and support is key.

As for the classical music thing - Mahler is my absolute favorite, but I love everything from Renaissance to Avant-Garde, from well-known repertoire to the most obscure composers. I enjoy jazz (swing and bebop) and classic rock as well.

Thank you again!
-James

Oh, I forgot to mention jazz. I was raised on Jacques Loussier, Claude Bolling and Dave Brubeck. When I don't notice what I am doing, I find myself singing a song in 4/4 whilst drumming with my hands or feet in 7/4. That's because when I was about 12 years old I sent myself the challenge of being able to clap to Dave Brubeck's Unsquare Dance, and I practiced it so many times that the habit stayed with me to this day.

And my father is crazy about Mahler. He developed a special 1-hour slideshow (with music) on the life of Alma Schindler; he started a similar thing on Alban Berg's opera Woyzzeck, and he gave me a big stack of Mahler CDs because he said he got DVDs of everything now.