can the popularity contest threads stop?

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No, they actually cannot stop. It is impossible.

amen sister!

It is unpossible

no need for apology. i misunderstood.

Never mind. Misunderstandings happen.

I feel for the autistics who feel left out in this forum. Even here in an online autistic community, these things are bound to happen. Not every person is going to be happy and satisfied. That's how it is whether here or in real life.

When I first became a mod I was told it was policy that the popularity threads were always locked. But Alex eventually made it clear he disagreed with that policy. He's the boss.

Still, I think such threads should be strongly discouraged. This sort of thing always results in hurt feelings, ALWAYS, whether or not anyone is brave enough to admit it. I find it sad that so many people on this forum can actually not care about that, or throw out the "they choose to feel excluded" line. Baloney. Highlighting large swaths of people IS the same as telling others they don't matter. It's just as true when it is done by someone with AS as it is when it is done by high school cheerleaders.

An extra appropriate section should have been added for the ones complaining about the main issue of this topic.

That way, both sides are happy.

On what mandate do people think such a decision should be made? The silent majority have been rather silent on their views regarding the matter so who are you to presume that is how they would wish things to be run precisely?

Stop being aspies for a second and realise you can't artificially create a community a community will come about and will only be as strong as what people contribute to it. What should be encouraged is for people to create threads to diversify the kind of topics discussed to venture and make better use of the sub-forums.

Alex tried to directly control this site and it totally went tits up as a consequence and he pissed a lot of people off in the process. If it ain't broke don't fix it ladies and gentleman. Communities can self regulate themselves.

QFT

It's counter-productive to discourage people from expressing themselves. I thought this was pretty obvious when the s**t hit the fan in the adult section not too long ago.

We prevent people from expressing themselves all the time, when such expression is likely to cause havoc, hurt or legal issues. It's called Terms of Service.

The question isn't whether expression can be limited but, rather, what is the practical point at which to draw those limits.

I am entirely frustrated at how unwilling some members are to acknowledge that anything they do might actually hurt people. It seems nice, probably, to finally be on the inside, so why can't one enjoy that, right? But you still have to think about what happens to those still on the outside. They can and do get hurt, and that isn't what we're supposed to be about.

People need to stop defending it and start thinking about what they can do on their own, as members, to make sure everyone feels included.

it kinds of feels like there are two different issues people are talking about now (or are they 2 aspects of the same question?) - first, the popularity threads where people vote for their favourite member or somesuch, and second, the proliferation of chit-chat in otehrwise serious threads.

are these two things related somehow? i am getting confused.

I fully agree with DW_a_mom. I know how excluded and dismissed people feel in such instances and I commend katzefrau for speaking up, many don't as they know they'll be accused of "spoiling people's fun".

I'm very sadden by the "join in or STFU" attitude - especially since some just get very defensive and don't seem to realise or don't care how many people here are not able to do so. Lower functioning or more impaired users are often dismissed and ignored, leaving them feeling as hurt and marginalised as they do in IRL instead of finding some support and shelter in here.

I also understand how good it feels for some to finally fit in, especially those who need/are capable of more interaction - this is a good thing and one of the purposes of this place. I'm grateful to those who don't do it on others' expense and try to pay attention to how those around them feel and take time to offer help or a good word to people outside their group or the forum they post in most often.

This is the saddest part of the whole affair, and I can see the view of both sides to a certain degree because I don't think the people involved even realize what they are doing. I also don't think they care to. They see what they do as "their fun" and if anyone wants to join in they can, therefore it is not exclusive. What they fail to realize or take into consideration is that other people don't see what they are doing as "fun". They see it as spreading themselves across the entire website and forcing everyone to have to watch their particular kind of fun, and have a hard time getting away from it. They see it as uncomfortable. They don't want to change the way they interact on the site just to fit in with what is becoming the popular norm. I myself have always found it extremely irritating to have to read the types of posts that people are complaining about, and the problem is that they are getting very difficult to get away from. Some find it more than irritating, they find it impossible to deal with. Those who refuse to contain themselves launch into tirades of entitlement and false persecution when asked to slow down or limit themselves and instead attack the members who are using the site for its intended purpose. The new politicking threads and popularity threads are simply an example of the continued spread.

So far they have left The Haven alone, which is what I meant by "serious business" is still conducted there.

The bottom line, as I see it, is that what they are engaging in is not the core purpose of the site, but is in fact interfering with the core purpose of the site and this is why it was previously disallowed. The decision to allow these things again was likely another knee-jerk reaction made by an administrator who does not actually know what is going on around here to a complaint received on Facebook or some other medium to which he still bothers to interact.



Indeed. The interesting thing is that the members who originally started this form of posting are not the same people who get offended when asked to limit themselves. The "second generation" members, those who saw what was going on and "joined in" later, are the ones who get fully incensed when any attempt to limit their posting is made. The dynamic is very interesting in that you can see how these members have never fit in before and have now found a venue to do so for the first time, and suffer from severe over-reaction when asked to tone it down. I don't know what the answer is, I don't even think there really is one. What you are watching is the evolution of this site into something different from what it used to be.

What it is evolving into is probably a busier place with more page-views and higher ad revenue, and therefore will continue to be encouraged down the current path. There are alternatives for members who want to maintain a more serious tone, and I can't blame them for moving on.

^
Thank you, for the most part you elaborated my point perfectly. Even people in the PPR started complaining that those trends are killing any substantial discussion. Laz and B9 are right, the way a forum evolves and the quality of interaction will be determined by the majority of participants and on such a large forum you'll see significant fluctuations - it can be very interesting to watch from a more detached POV but I admit it can get very hard when you try to help the "invisible" ones.

lately i've started to try of watch how the threads devolve, because i am interested in seeing how things can be done differently (cue the song "Too Much Time On My Hands").

it seems like most threads start on-topic, then a predictable series of events happen. at first, the first few posters contribute opinions and some general debate and discussion happens.

then, someone enters the thread and aims a friendly comment directly at one of the other posters (a friend, usually) in a less serious or joking way, or the person will contribute something off topic. at first it is not a problem because it is just a single small exchange. it's a minor diversion that allows people to slightly connect with each other in a way, i.e.


Topic: Autism in the Workplace

Person X: i have trouble at my job at Best Buy. when i melt down i break the plasma tv's
Person Y: i like plasma tv's too.
Person X: yeah they are cool, but it's not so cool when i break them!
Person O: i try to take a time out when i get upset a work
Person X: yeah i like to take frequent short breaks too
Person Y: is it hard to work with customers when you get upset?
...

in this situation, it is not a big problem because the thread was allowed to go back on topic. before the current WP climate, the conversations used to get redirected and refocused a bit better after brief sub-conversations, and sometimes there is still no problem.

but sometimes, particular members keep on having a side conversation that continues for pages, so that other people who want to stay on topic are kind of ignored, i.e.


Topic: Autism in the Workplace

Person X: i have trouble at my job at Best Buy. when i melt down i break the plasma tv's
Person Y: i like plasma tv's too.
Person X: yeah they are cool, but it's not so cool when i break them!
Person Y: i just got a 30 inch screen last week.
Person X: what is the colour quality like?
Person O: i try to take a time out when i get upset at work
Person Y: it's not bad but i didn't get the newest model
Person X: never buy a floor model as it will not last
Person Y: i know, you can't even get a warranty on a floor model
Person O:

...

it sucks to be ignored in a thread because the original topic has been diverted by the prolific posters. a thread can even degenerate in the lag of time it takes a slower typist to compose a contribution. the people who engage so heavily in the subconversation seem to want to have a lot of playful and conversational interaction, and there are threads set aside for this purpose. but once a thread really degenerates, it is hella hard to get it back on track. trust me, i've tried.

(sorry to bore you with my re-enactment, but i didn't know how to explain it properly)