Problem with Men on WP

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Still, I think the fact that its known that a lot of guys here do that make the quality guys not want to take that initiative just because they don't even want to be accidentally correlated to all that (and if its really a landslide of crap that your getting in your PM box, would you read it all?)

yes but it has to be done in a way that makes the woman feel apperciated. Women make associations faster then men they see guy from internet wants my address we hardly talked must mean he wants sex. Not to mention the internet as a whole is filled with potential possibilities for bad situations them giving you personal information is putting themselves in danger possibly. They need to know you deserve it and that your not one of those people.

Yes people have problems approaching possible love interests especially when you have multiple suitors who are trying to do the same thing but I'd like to believe and in all my possible experiences class outweighed if you say hey how are you? I wanted to learn more about you generally you'll receive a more favorable response then First message: hi second message: let me have your address. That doesn't mean you turn around and ask for address just because you went about it in a better way it just means you'll get a better chance of getting what you want later on. I'll give an example here ...

I met a girl off hotornot shes my type of girl and I thought she was beautiful. So I said hi to her and also a friend of hers. We talked I said hi introduced myself asked about her and everything and then I sent her my aim name. We talked on the messenger and basically we're planning to meet at a local mall and since I wanted her to be comfortable I said look just tell me what mall you want me to meet you at and bring some friends I'll bring some friends and we'll just hang out so then you know more about me I know more about how you are when your not at the keyboard. This is supposed to happen over winter break hopefully and we have a good connection.

Yea I wanted to see if romantic possibilities but I realize she needs to trust me and some men have hurt her in the past so I work on that slowly but surely. In the end I'm receiving favorable responses and I'm getting towards a spot where I can look into those possiblities but it still may not happen but instead of being that guy ignored because I went about it the wrong way I'm that guy whos cool who talks to her on the internet. In my mind its all about results.

Is using "ASL?" as an introduction, a bad thing?

I have PMed like a couple of women before, which I am afraid they might think I may have been on to something, I hardly PM anyone, because I am really bad at conversations.

Probably those who bother women like that, are mostly for reasons very similar like trolls and spammers, but yeah, if someone asks for private information, it is best to report it.

Abangyarudo, I'd still chat someone up in the forums and if I see connections just growing on their own - that's how I'd rather go at it. There's way too much that you just can't tell about a person online and I tend to be someone who'd probably do better just meeting people IRL. Mind you, chatting online and on here - if I have a lot in common with someone but interest isn't involved, I have no trouble there and don't feel the need to break boundaries, particularly because I hate to mess with a good thing in that regard.

I understand but what I mean is results are based on how you approach it the fault of the people who started the interactions with the women were not about them taking inituitive it was how they went about doing it. If they had respected the woman they would have gotten a better result. Women are cautious for any thing that seems devalueing them a man who asks for a address on the 2nd pm makes them make the emotional connection that they only want sex in effect devaluing them.

I agree with your assesment thats why to gauge the character and how much they differ from who they are online requires meeting. In the end thats for good and bad really because people out the not having to save face in public talk more freely about things that concern them then in real life. It gives me the moment in which to find out whats going on inside their head without taking down all the walls people put up to protect themselves. They are safe and I cannot do anything to them at that moment if I was a bad person so they don't see a need to hide especially if I'm not really close to them or know their friends.

I get what your saying, just don't know that I want to keep talking about it. Even the fact that we've gone on this far about it looks pretty bad. I just think that when random guys hit up random girls though, its not even "are they who they say they are online" thats an issue - they can't even tell who they are in the sense of would they mesh IRL, if they'd even be attracted to one another, and that very fact makes the whole thing just wreak of desperation no matter how tactfully they approach it (unless that is you've already been trading all kinds of cues to each other in the forums and are just following up with each other outside of it). I don't know, something just feels real highschool or junior high about it.

This is a very disturbing topic.

I feel badly for this young woman. I know that being bothered by men will not be a problem with me as I have never had this problem with them bothering me before. I have avoided males except for the fathers of my three children. Now at my age I no longer have that worry. It is no longer a threat.

I don't much PM people anymore (no one new)
the odd time I do, but I just for the most part
don't give a s**t
let someone else do it
girls don't want guy friends it sounds like...
and I have enough annoying girl-NT friends

Kilroy, it's not that girls don't want guy friends, but it's that tiny percentage of dillweeds that ruin for the rest of you guys.

And that's too bad, because for most of my life, most of my friends were men. I like guys. But there's always that personal wariness because of that off chance that a guy is going to turn into a pumpkin. Maybe he's just a jerk, but sometimes it can be much worse.

WHich makes it worse for the good people out there. I'm sorry it's that way. I just wish the jerks, male and female, had a neon sign on their head that told the whole world what real losers they are so we can all avoid them.

Its in the calculus really - what they say, what they do, you can most of the time vibe it off of them to an extent but I agree, on the internet it gets trickier just because there's no person, no gestalt to see nor all the things they do through a day in their lives.

I have not been receiving notifications on this thread! I thought it had died.

I see that there have been other responses. I would like to say that the incidents that I was referring to, involved people who either were new to WP, and started out by asking for my personal e-mail address right away, or started out with a friendly pm or two, and then asking for nude pics. I don't mind hearing from people, new or veterans of WP, but it must be respectful. I have had people like what I said in a post, and then express an interest in me, and I have dealt with them politely.

well they ruined it so I rarely talk to girls anymore
(never in RL)

It should really be "problem with MAN on WP"

Because the majority of males by far on here are actually wonderful people and wouldn't dream of rude gestures and comments. However, the very nature of AS means this person might not even be aware they have offended you, I just hope you took this into account, because it would be horrible if someone was just trying to communicate and now everyones talked about how sad and pathetic they are.

Is this going to help them? Definately not.

But even when they're told, they still do it.

May I ask, has this problem been sorted out?

There's still a problem with one person at least.