Reasons Aspies don't join/leave WP?

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Using the linked thread and the linked thread only without knowing anything else, the insulting generalization about conservatives was, well, quite insulting. The ensuing racist diatribe was even worse, yes, but neither of the two striked me as particularly civil during that, huh, conversation. As they say, a fight needs two people, and she did play her part in it.

Maybe she was the nicest person ever outside that example, but I am only talking anout that particular example.

Also, Dox47, how did L&D use to be, and why do you think it changed? I am still curious as is another member.

Could posters please use another thread for discussion of the above topics? WP is big, not everything has to be in this thread.

I suppose its like any other discussion site on the WWW, people come & go. Heck there are a couple of places, like Healingwell that I no longer visit much, though I consider it my support group for my Crohn's disease. Well, there were also some internal politics over there & a couple of my long-time friends left, so it feels less comfortable than in the Past..
As for WrongPlanet, I did not expect much support, but being able to talk about my quirks & other ASD traits feels somewhat liberating. I do agree that the Aspies are Superior to NTs and NTs are responsible for ALL my troubles" threads get tiresome at times, but other discussions are still helpful...

Sincerely,
Matthew

First: I'll avoid talking about specific events or locked topics from now on, and focus more on the general concept of "it takes two to tango". Sorry Palpatine, I just hope it won't take too long but it doesn't seem to be big enough to warrant a topic on it's own.

I see what you mean, there have been times in the past when someone starts a fight with me and I answer in kind, and we both got blamed for it and it felt like an injustice. But there is also another saying: "never argue with an idiot, he will bring you down to his level". If someone starts screaming at me and I scream back, maybe the other person started, but from a third person view I still look bad and I am also answering a wrong with another wrong. I wouldn't know about what you've been through, sometimes it is just people pulling reasons out of nowhere to defend their favorite or downplay the situation, but some other times it is hard to see from an external point of view who started what, and it becomes ultimately irrelevant if the two people are deep into insulting each other

I don't get deep into insulting people, but I have had people stalk me on forums or elsewhere and constantly try to pick fights with me, despite the fact that I prefer to restrict my responses to disagreement with what they are saying and not with who they are as a person.\

It doesn't take two to fight. It only takes one. The other can respond, but the response is not necessarily in the context of the argument.

I also think that it's entirely too easy to elide all context from the argument and simply look at an argument as two people yelling at each other, without understanding the reasons why each yells at the other.

Essentially, "it takes two to fight" always favors the aggressor or bully, because it puts their target on the same moral level despite the likelihood that the two simply cannot be placed on the same moral level with a full understanding of their actions.

I've seen at least one case of that in this forum with you, you seemed to handle it well, and it ultimately went to your favour.

Fighting is two people against each other to see who is "best" or whatever, if the other responds reasonably then I wouldn't consider it a fight.

It is, but also sometimes it is just too hard to look through all the yelling and different versions of the truth, especially if they have been at it for a long time. As an example, let's say I am in the living room and someone insults them, then I insult them back, and then they do the same and it goes on for a while until a third party arrives. I say the other person started it, the other person says that I started it. Being a case of my word against theirs, the third party has no way to know whose fault it is.

It does favor the bully but... that's just the way things are. From an ethical point of view, I don't believe answering evil with evil is the answer. And more relevant to the current discussion, from a pragmatical point of view, not yelling back makes for much better strategy, as a third party is more likely to side with the quiet one. Of course, this could be abused; a savy troublemaker could provoke someone else into attacking him and then make as if he is the reasonable one. This only furthers my point though, not losing one's temper is best.

I think there are many reasons, and it depends a lot on what you hope to get out of posting on here. For me, I am/was actually looking for a level of connection, feeling less alone. This has worked to a degree, in a similar way that reading a book can make you feel less alone - you sometimes see your reflection in what other people say. Apart from that, however, this hasn't really happened for me - I don't have a personal relationship with anyone on here.

I'll just post from the perspective of someone who not only deals with AS but also with deep-rooted depression and anxiety issues. I don't really feel at home here. Some people in this thread have mentioned negativity and making one's problems out to be more profound than those of other people. It may not be so, but I feel like this is addressing posts that I have made or was considering to make. I'm pretty sure my posts can seem self-obsessive and self-important. But what some people consider whining for me is only an attempt at expressing my experience, usually in the childish hope that someone will come along and explain how I can make the pain stop. I'm aware that this is an unrealistic idea, and the fact that I still sometimes create those kinds of posts signifies my level of helplessness in dealing with it on my own.
I know that many people don't really want to be bothered with things that don't have easy solutions, or things they can't really understand.
I feel like some people think that if I don't believe I can get better, I should just shut up and get out of everybody's way. Reminds me of that one guy in "Lost" that was dying slowly in S1 and made everyone uncomfortable with his screaming and his pain.

So, those are the main reasons that make me consider leaving: not feeling like I fit in, inability to connect, feeling like I'm bothering people - which kind of sums up my experience in other social settings.

Damn, that made it look as if I was stalking you. For the record, I'm not. I meant someone trying to pick a fight with you, I was lurking on some thread and I noticed.

Getting angry is fine, but lashing out I'd say is less so. And we seem to have come to an agreement? Then we can give AgentPalpatine his thread back~