How to help people threatening suicide, or harm to others?

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What can I do? I feel useless. I don't know these people, and I don't know how to help them. Is there anyway they can get his IP and contact the proper authorities??

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt136447.html
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt136074.html

what can I do for these people??

I don't think there is anything that can be done, really, other than post local hot-line numbers if you know where the person lives. This site is not a suicide intervention hot-line. I actually would prefer it if we adopted the stance of many websites, that discussing it isn't even allowed. But, apparently, that includes its own legal problems. So ... the answer is basically that, officially, there is nothing we can do. As a friend, you are most welcome to try.

Thankfully, both of those situations have resolved themselves. Often, I think, all the person really needs to know at that moment in time is that someone is willing to say, "I really don't want you to do that, and even though it seems all I can do to stop it is sit here and write to you, I am willing to try."

Yeah, basically just keep them talking. About almost anything. It's really all you can do over the internet. Sometimes posts like that are hoaxes, but the problem is, you NEVER really know for sure.

If you keep somebody like that talking, a lot of the time they eventually realize the feelings they had in the moment they first posted subside. Distraction is often all it takes. Let them know they really aren't alone, not by telling them they aren't (that's often viewed as a BS ruse for no other purpose than to change their mind), but by demonstrating it. Be there, if you can. Answer. Talk.

And if you can, get some other users involved.

I'm not even going to comment about rudely telling them to just go ahead and do it, because I really shouldn't have to. It's just wrong and stupid.

There is another one. I can't stand this.

ShadesOfMe, I get the feeling you are extremely sensitive to this kind of thing. I'm not sure why, and you don't need to go into it, but maybe (?) I can help a little (Big fat question mark)

I've been on many forums for the past ten years, and have seen this kind of thing many times. It's very common.

I understand how you feel. You NEVER know whether the poster is for real or not, so you MUST assume they are for real. Unfortunately, many times, they are not. Many times they are attention seekers, with no intent to kill themselves. I'm with you though, in that we should never assume that's the case, because if only once it turns out they are for real, and we did nothing, or even encouraged them to do it, a human being just may die.

The problem is, for some of us, me included at one time, we may feel as though we need to do something every single time this happens.

But the truth is, we don't. should nobody do anything? No! That isn't what I mean.

What can happen though, is that some of us who feel as if we should and need to do everything we can to make a difference in this world, can be easily drawn to feeling as if we must respond to each and every emergency situation that comes up. Is that really realistic though? Is it really so that if I don't respond, nobody else will?

Hardly! And do you know why? Because there are enough people out there who feel like this that any call for help like that will ALWAYS get a response, especially on the internet.

My point it, yes we must take these threats very seriously, because if only one in a hundred is for real, then if all the real ones are stopped, we have saved ten lives out of a thousand threats. If that isn't worth the effort, then what the hell is?

BUT, and this is a very big BUT, if we let threats like that monopolize our thoughts and emotional energy, we can become so drained and demoralized, WE can slip into negative energies and unhealthy places ourselves. If we do that, what good are we to those who really do want to just throw their lives away?

You need to learn to strike a balance. Look at any of those kinds of threads. Are you the only person that responds? Ever? Are there not several others who do? Every time?

You, me, and anyone who has the heart to respond to those threads, needs time outs. Refresher breaks. Frankly, I can't respond to very many of them at all, because I spent so much of my own life responding to my own mother's threats. I have, a handful of times, but I haven't found that I've ever felt it was necessary because so many others are ready, willing and able to step right up to the plate. Almost every time, the person is convinced not to do it. In fact, I can only remember two times it hasn't worked out, and both of them I did not have personal contact with. I saw them on the news.

What I'm trying to help you understand is that you do not have to feel obligated to respond to every single suicide threat. There are PLENTY of other users here who will step in when the need is expressed. Do only what you CAN, and if it begins to bother you, stay out of the members only and haven forums for a while. Take the breaks you need to from it. One person cannot save the entire world. And if you try, you will end up being no good to save even one person.

Yeah I don't read suicide threads. I just ignore them.

Last edited by League_Girl on 01 Sep 2010, 11:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Okay. I wish I'd read this before posting a long reply to your reply in "that other thread."

NP. It might help somebody else. Who knows?

For some, simply not replying is the best thing. TBH, I hardly never reply to them either. I've been drained enough with personal experience in that department.

It's damned draining, it is.

On many forums I frequent such threads are removed by the mods.

But when I do come across them I oftendo no know what to do. I have to consider the possibility that something I say could in fact make things even worse. I dont know all the triggers.