Community Dynamics

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Seeing as we have several problems with community dynamics (mainly the adult forum) I thought it may be a good idea to have a discussion on how to fix the problem here, where everyone can have a say.

The problem as I see it is as follows:

1. People feel their posts get lost in a lot of chatter
2. Some people feel left out due to many people in certain forums being friends
3. Some threads don't relate to the forums posted in but are there for a reason.

Where should the line be drawn between forum structure and community enjoyment?
Because as I see it, people tend to post threads in specific places because of the people rather than the topic at hand, because the support and friendliness level is higher in some places than others to different people.

For example: People get more helpful replies to threads when they are posted in an active place as opposed to an inactive one. The forum structure tells us to do one thing, but the support level in different places makes it a more appealing place to make a thread.

Here is my proposed solution.

I noticed we have an in depth adult discussion forum.

Why not have an "adult issues" forum (people with problems can post and get support from people there) and an adult "chitchat" forum, like a common room for members who wish to engage in random discussion that may not be appropriate for younger members?

Being squashed into one thread is a good idea in theory, but it's rather unpleasant to post in. I think an adult chitchat forum will let people be a bit free-er and still confine chit chat to one place?

I am interested in other ideas an opinions.

First, I want to say that I know being a moderator is a thankless job. I used to moderate for a large parenting forum and it sucked. I mean no disrespect to the moderation staff here who volunteer their time.

With that said.....

I've tested the waters with many different subforums upon joining this year. I now hang out in the Adult Issues Forum because it is often fun. Yet, when I do have an issue, there are supportive people there who face the same challenges as I do. I enjoy the variety of people there. I am relatively "new" to that forum (within a couple months of posting there). I didn't have an issue joining in the discussion with effort.

I have become annoyed with the drama that seems to keep coming there because people feel left out or accuse another of being fake. I also very much dislike the frequent posters being attacked as a clique in numerous places throughout the forum. What baffles me the most is I don't see people who are left out and I don't see a clique. There is a LARGE number of frequent posters in that subforum. Others come and go. I see them welcomed and talked to, especially if you see that face there a few times.

I also see the feelings of lurkers (?) being put above the feelings of the diverse posters who keep the forum fun & supportive. There has to be a way for everyone to feel welcomed. It shouldn't be either/or.

I understand that there is flirting and banter. Sometimes, I am not in the mood for it either (sometimes, I am!). When I'm not, I just click through. I should note that I have multiple times, interrupted a flirty thread for a bad day and I've always gotten a supportive response.

That was a lot of rambling with no real point other than I think there is now a group of people feeling somewhat unwelcomed. I don't really know what the solution is. We have a thread stickied, but that's only so helpful if the frequent posters feel like they are being called a clique and outcast into a single thread.

I don't think there should be a separate forum. The ones complaining need to learn how to adapt to any given situation that arises and not use their autism as an excuse to stay whiny and boring.

So far i agree with every post.....how rare is that

They all have merit, but abaisse's hits closest to the mark for me.

Thanks to hale_bopp for always thinking and putting forward ideas.

abaisse nailed it, IMO.

In theory, I agree. There appears to be a need for some kind of 'lounge' forum or something.

In practice, don't hold your breath for it to happen. And Alex doesn't owe anyone here any provision of any kind at all.

I suggested in another thread that one of you guys makes your own forum, Like what Manny did. Then you can choose to moderate yourselves like however you want. Again, not because I want to get rid of anyone; it would solve the problem.

It wouldn't really solve the problem. We would just be excluding people here, and I, at least, have no desire to exclude anyone.

Is Alex the only one with permissions to manage boards? I thought there were other admins, then again they may not have the manage board permission.
I don't know what he thinks of my opinions but just having a look wouldn't hurt would it?