So I got sent to the principal's office today...

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...over an innocent Facebook post I made, that was not directed toward ANYONE, and was not intended to cause anyone trouble. It was a link to a song on YouTube. What it is doesn't matter in the slightest now. Somebody reported me, and then the Vice Principal thought I was going to shoot up the place. I kept reassuring him that I'm NOT that type of person, and he didn't care. He kept telling me about how "my intentions are not what matters, and how people react is". If that's the case, then it's their fault for reacting the way they did, not my fault for making the offending Facebook post! The post was made outside of school, to make matters worse! (I deleted the post in his office just to make him happy.)

In an ideal world, I would have just requested the opportunity to delete the post, done so, and everyone would go along with their days happily ever after. But noooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooo...

Today is my mother's birthday. She is a single parent and I am her only child. Why would I want to have it be ruined by some call home from the Vice Principal? I could barely survive through the day after I was called down and heard the bad news, and actually went to the nurse during art class because I was feeling so weak, anxious and nauseous. I talked about what happened with the nurse and told her about the fact that today is my mom's birthday and I wouldn't want her day to be ruined because she heard about my little trip down to the office today - she has enough going on as it is. More importantly, I wouldn't want her to overreact to it, like she usually does in cases such as this. I have had "disciplinary issues" in the past, but it has never involved me hurting another student, drugs, vandalism, skipping, cheating or anything of the like. Yet, if all goes according to plan, my mother should be receiving a telephone call tomorrow (tomorrow, because I had to beg the VP to not call on her birthday) and I'm going to be suspended. Yay, me!

Don't tell me that I "brought this all upon myself". I'm at risk of being beaten, screamed at and disowned all because of a minor (in my worthless opinion, at least) disciplinary infraction. And don't even make me go there on what will happen with my psychiatrist. I'm already in hot water in her eyes. It's not my fault, it's the fault of the authority figures in question here for reacting in such a totalitarian matter over something that's so small. Why don't they go after the real problem children?

In case you're wondering, I am 17 and am a senior in high school. Why must things like this matter so much?

I want to puke my guts out now.

Don't go reporting this to any Social Services agencies or police or anything like that. I beg of you. I've been down that road before, and trust me, it's no fun.

I just want everything to work out fine so that my relationship between my mother and I works. Does anyone have any suggestions for me...?

I would write an anonymous letter to the editor about what happened and what the principal said. I would then lie and say that I was suicidal over it because he made me feel so bad about myself and made me see that I am absolutely nothing, will never be anything, and can only annoy and bother others for the rest of my worthless life. Then when he responds that he didn't mean for me to feel that way I would point out that it isn't his intent that's important, it's how other people react that's important. Then wait and see if it sinks in.

Oooooooh, burn! I love it!

Yeah, it should be noted that this man, the VP, is probably the most hated person in the school regardless...

What do you mean by "editor" though? Editor of the school magazine?

IMPORTANT EDIT: I told my mom about it. She didn't mind. At all! She actually took my side on the issue to an extent. She'll be expecting the call tomorrow. Now all I have to deal with is the potential punishment...

I live in a rich suburb and most everyone here has their head firmly embedded up their @$$ anyway, and the VP is no exception. It looks like everything's in the clear for me at the moment, but nevertheless I felt it was a good idea for me to get this off my chest.

Thank you once again for your reply.

I have no interest in reporting you to any social service agency. You're protected on WP anyway. As a musician and songwriter, I am curious as to what the song you linked to in FB was.

No, they won't publish it I'm sure. I was thinking more along the lines of the local newspaper. But, if you want to be more low key, maybe you could go to the school counselor after your suspension (or still go, even if you don't get suspended) and talk about how bad you feel about yourself now, for making people worry over a FB post. Be convincing. Act like you really hate yourself for upsetting people the way you did. Tell her you feel a little better from talking to her but not all that much. Keep going to see her. Eventually they will call your parents and you can tell them convincingly how awfull and terrible you feel because of what you did. And then they will get seriously pissed at the VP and come in all angry and talk to him. That's when they will probably bring you in the room and when he says that it wasn't his intention to make you this depressed and upset you can say "You told me that the intent doesn't matter, only the reaction does. Was that a lie? Why can't I trust anybody anymore?" and dissolve into a puddle of tears.

Then after he gets yelled at by your parents you can suddenly feel better after your cathartic moment in his office when you realized he was nothing more than a big ole lying sack of political BS.

The trick is to make them think that what he said to you made you feel this bad, and your concern over how others felt because he said they felt upset over it. You got to play this just right and not be too impatient to get to the punch line. It can take a few days or even a week or two of moping around and hating yourself and such. In the meantime don't get into any trouble at all. Do whatever you can not to, even if it's hard to stop yourself from just saying that one smart ass remark or doing that one thing you just wanted to do. Remember, you are very upset and depressed. A person on that condition wouldn't feel up to that. Mope around. When your parents ask whats wrong tell them "nothing" at first. Then tell them after a bit. Don't do anything, like cut or threaten to do anything or even hint that you are suicidal because then things get out of hand. Just be very, very sad and very down on yourself because you realized what a s**t you are to do that so uncaringly. I mean, what kind of kid posts song lyrics to his FB after all? (I say that sarcastically because I see it all the time and found out what it was when one of the kids posted something that made me think she was sad so I drove to her work just to hug her and she told me she was so glad I cared that much but it was song lyrics)

So, yeah. Do that. Be kind of down tonight too. Not angry. Maybe ask them "Do you think I seem uncaring about other's feelings?" like you really want to know and when they ask why just say "No reason" and go lay down. Or listen to music quietly. Sadly. If you get suspended, don't act mad or like it's unfair. Have this "I'd suspend an uncaring s**t like me too" kind of thing. Think Eyore from Winnie the Pooh. That's what you want to go for. You want them to be concerned about you but not to be to the point where they take you to the emergency room or a psychiatrist. It's a fine line to walk with some parents, but you know yours and what you can and cant do.

Good luck, and report back please.

BTW, I'm a mom and grandmom and I'd go up there and rip that principal a new one over being stupid about a FB post for Gods sakes, but I know some parents who wouldn't and who would get upset over you getting suspended. My 18yo son got suspended and in school detentions so much that it was unusual when he didn't have one. But I didn't get that mad at him over it. I know parents who go overboard about stuff like this though, and I know exactly how to work this. Get them concerned over you, get them to be mad at the VP, get them to say something to the VP or the principal, get yourself in the middle of it to quote him to himself. Sure, HE will know that it's all a scam when you quote his words back at him, but nobody else will and so what anyway? That makes it even better knowing that you got him and he can do nothing about it.

Hahaha, thank you Mr. Robin. You probably wouldn't like the song, and at very least you could probably see why any "normal" person would get concerned. But regardless, I present to you "Shroud of Encryption" by Devourment...
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nLLQUiu5J8[/youtube]
It's good to realize that like many things about me, my music taste is far from normal.

Olive Oil Mom - thank you once again for your kind proposal in striking against my corrupt school institution. But, alas, you're a little late to the party...

I would like to fervently apologize if you feel like you wasted writing those healthy blocks of text - which I did indeed read, by the way, regardless if they were a little out of date.

Nevertheless, thank you a million times over! Sorry if I can't reply all to quick - my wi-fi connection is kind of crap to say the least.

And yes, things are good between my mom and I.

You can still do it you know. It gets the a**hole back when the school counselor talks to him about it. Keep apologizing to him, over and over. Let a few days go by then apologize again. Go overboard in your apology. Maybe send some flowers or a stuffed bear to him next month. Make him realize how over the top he went.

What exactly did you say?

What I find most offensive is that 'Devourment' is not a word. As poetry it's evocative, but kind of hamhanded. I've heard both better and worse, but I wouldn't assume that someone who liked the song was a dangerous psychopath, any more than I would think that of people who like Alice Cooper, Marilyn Manson or Rob Zombie. When I was your age I especially loved Alice Cooper's 'Steven' and 'I Love the Dead.' Judas Priest did several catchy tunes from the perspective of murderers - including the best Jack the Ripper song I ever heard.

Last edited by Willard on 18 Nov 2013, 9:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Meh, He was just doing his job. You know by the lyrics that this is the truth. He just sucks at his job. Probably because of the overwhelming amount of this type of thing he has to deal with (it's not just you, right.)

But I have to ask, why aren't you listening to more intelligent metal, man? There's so much of it out there. This is just talentless garbage; any half-wit could write those lyrics.

Lastly, speaking as a former punk (25+ years ago): Don't do s**t just to get under people's skin. I did sometimes, but man in retrospect, it makes life an annoying pain in the ass for everyone involved.

Maybe it's the age thing. I kind of feel bad for half the crap I put the adults in my life through. With the years of perspective, they're just like anyone: they're trying to get through the day so they can get home to neglect their families.

I admit I'm a bit torn here. One one hand, freedom of expression is truly precious to us... all of our "accepted norms" of knowledge and behavior were at one time denigrated. But also, Columbine.

At the end of the day, the [vice] principal can't not take action. The rest of us expect him to keep an eye out for the safety of that building full of children.

Well, yes, IF the song were some sort of direct threat or incitement to kill or maim or commit acts of terror - but in this case it's just so over-the-top morbid, I don't see how anyone can take that seriously. It's like freaking out over a plastic Halloween skull. I'd be much more concerned about somebody posting Ice T's 'Cop Killer.'

And again, we come back to - just how much right does the school have to interfere in an individual's personal life? It's one thing for someone to say "Hey, did you see what So-and-So posted on Facebook?" and be aware of it, it's a public venue, after all, but it's another matter to force them to remove it. It's not like they posted it on the school's website. And what does it solve, really? If you do have a student who's a dangerous psychopath, making them remove a post from FaceBook isn't going to solve the problem. It might actually make it worse, by adding to their feelings of persecution and rage.

I dunno, in any case, I don't think it's necessary to get belligerent with the student about it unless they just choose to be surly and uncooperative. And some do.

Agreed! I would have called him in to make sure he's not a psychopath and called it a day. To insinuate that my (society's) reaction is somehow a burden for Mayhem to carry was the BS that made me think he's just bad at his job.



I missed this part (I'm a terrible reader, my apologies). This is unacceptable. It's just another piece of evidence that he's just bad at his job, or burnt-out and needs to move on.


That was me; I was as you describe. :blush: It's just part of the whole AS thing, maybe. (?) People bugged the hell out of me, I wanted them to feel what I was feeling. And that's the part I regret now. It never made me feel any better, it just gave me stories to tell my buddies.

I am and do. I have the perfect song that relates to the condition of Asperger's, as a matter of fact. (James LaBrie's voice kinda gets to me but it's all good )
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTHfGtaZb08[/youtube]

Also, granted, Devourment is indeed a very incoherent band as far as metal is concerned... but hey, sometimes you're (well, I, at least) in the mood for musical fillet mignon and sometimes I'm down for condemned, embalmed beef.



That's a great point, but I have no intention of getting under people's skin. But then again, my intentions don't matter, it's peoples reactions, right?



Thank you. More people need to go by that logic.



Which ones?! As a diehard 'Priest fan, like my father, I'd be very interested to know... surely it isn't "Breaking the Law"...



Dude, you should hear of some of the writing I have proposed...

Thank you all for your replies. I appreciate the input from all the members here. I just hope my disciplinary meeting with the actual principal and VP goes well... hopefully it'll be nothing more than an after-school session or something...

Wait, what are you being disciplined for? Let me go re-read your lead-off post. I missed some major points.

(I'll listen to the other song you posted in a moment. I'm eager, it's just that I'm fired up now.)