A Funny Story

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When I was in 5th grade I was not a good student. I lacked incentive to do my work. So I got Ds and Es.So my teachers didn't like me much to begin with. I would get in trouble all the time being mean to others and others teasing me for being extremely thin and extremely ornery. So anyways.. here's to the funny part....

I was in the library. I was sitting at a table and I was bored. For fun, I decided to throw an eraser that I was holding on the ground. So my teacher, Mr. P., suspended me for it.

Mr. P.: "You're suspended!"
Jessica: (indifferent. after all, I was used to it. The principal's office ain't got nothin' on me)

Well, when my mom asked me why I was suspended and I told my mom what happened, she was not happy. She thought it was ridiculous. So she went to talk to the teacher.
(By the way, this is ABSOLUTELY true- that's why it's so hilarious!)

Jessi's Mom: "Why was Jessica suspended for throwing an eraser?"
Mr. P: "It was dangerous. She could have hurt somebody. What if that was a loaded gun?"
Jessi's Mom: (stares at him like he's out of his mind)

I hope it made you laugh. I giggle as I type about it. It is funny because 1) he compared an eraser to a weapon 2) I threw the eraser. People shoot guns. 3) a loaded gun. you cant load an eraser.
Me and my friend made up a whole game out of this. We would always say "you cant bring a _____ to school because.... we'd think of hilarious reasons why you couldn't bring relatively safe objects to school, etc.

Another short, funny detail. Our schoolbus had seat belts. So I would pretend it was a whip. Other times, we would make it as tight as we could, and compare, who's was tighter. One day I thought it was fun to tie a bunch of the seatbelts together.

If you have funny stories about things you've done in school like mischief, please tell me! I love to laugh about it!

EVERYBODY GET BACK! I'VE GOT AN ERASER AND IT'S F**KING LOADED!! !

That's funny.

Suspended?! You should have been expelled and then sent to prison for at least 10 years.

In my younger years, I was often ahead of my class, and I got in trouble for finishing my work too quickly.

Also, I once had a P.E teacher who tried so many times to teach me how to kick a football. My foot completely missed everytime. I know all the detils about what part of your foot makes contact with which part of the ball, how much power to use, and all of that stuff, yet when it came to physically kicking the ball I could never do it. I always left my P.E teacher rather puzzled.

A seventh-grade teacher once left the room for a few minutes, and I was able to quickly get all of us to turn our desks around and sit facing away from hers ... and after she had returned and scolded us a bit and got us all turned back forward again, she looked directly at me and called me out as the instigator. She later told my mother and I got another chewing, but I still have no idea how she had known to call me out. Maybe she could read faces or something?!