Being a Leader

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I was hired to be a Peer Mentor, which is like a Resident Assistant but instead of playing "babysitter" I help incoming students adjust to the new academic challenges of college - learning study skills, finding out how to register for classes, showing them what resources there are, communicating with professors, and things like that. I did not disclose that I had Asperger's during my interview, but I didn't think it would pose a problem. After all, I've made it this far and I feel that I've gained a lot of personal insight along the way. I have a high GPA and I'm much more sociable than I used to be, so I consider myself a success. In addition, I see my Asperger's as giving me a unique perspective that I feel is overlooked in programs like this. I want to show people that Aspies are capable of being the helpers, too, and not just the people that need help.

Now I'm having my doubts. Today the freshmen moved in, and while I enjoyed working at the sign-in desk and helping people there, I'm now dreading having to go out of my way to get to know all of these people, many of whom are unexpectedly taller and look more intimidating than I am. I decided to force myself to go around the rooms in my wing and introduce myself to everyone. The first room I walk into, I'm met with dead silence and blank stares. I carried the entire conversation by myself and the only words I got from them were quiet one-word answers to my questions. This apparent failure has made me quit that agenda and retire to my room, where I am now. I'll introduce myself to everyone at once later on at the hall meeting, which shouldn't be a problem, but how much can my nerves put up with in the long term?

Well, yes! You seem to have a very optimistic attitude, which is good, and bad. I will not delve into my philosophy of attitudes, but I will commend you on your leadership.

Thanks! As my mom told me, not everyone is going to cooperate with me, so maybe I just happened to approach the wrong people first. My introduction to the larger groups went a bit smoother than that, and since then I've had students approach me with a lot of respect and kindness.

I've been in numerous leadership positions in high school, and I have found it hard sometimes to get people to cooperate with me and let me do my job. But definitely don't give up. In time, you will get people who need your advice, and the feeling of helping those in need is wonderful. Just hang in there, and I'm sure the situation will improve. Besides, you seem t ohave achieved a lot of your personal goals, so you should be congratulating yourself, not doubting yourself.