Could I ask for a bit of help here please?

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I'm struggling to work... all my work really consists of right now is playing guitar and learning songs and stuff.
I know it sounds nuts but sometimes it feels as though a force is preventing me from being able to be compliant and pull my own weight... I'm in a band and such, but something's been highly stressing me out about my situation in the band.

I find it overwhelmingly difficult sometimes to pick up the guitar and learn some stuff. I think about doing it, try my very hardest to get myself to do it, but have been struggling immensely to do so.

I know this sounds kind of trivial and silly, but it's caused me a few meltdowns. I haven't been able to relax with work and stuff...

Sometimes it feels as though the world is trying to prevent me from thriving in this area... like nature has a conscience or something...

In any case, I know it's not the heaviest sounding situation... I just need to get into a good swing with my work.

Any help will be appreciated.

hi samtoo
i play a guitar have played one for 30 years but never been able to learn a full song, for some reason
some thing i dont know what just refuses to learn a song, i can play my own but when it comes to learning
a popular tune or song my brain just says no and wont obay or conform. been in a few bands when i was younger
and use to drive the band crazy forgetting my base lines and loosing track of the song, but if we were playing
one of our own songs i was fine. for me it seems to be a not wanting to confrom or take orders thing, as i
do have that problem. i would sugest sitting down and just twang away an make anything up for an hour or so
but dont play any one ellses tune just av a good twang of pure nonsense and enjoy urself, hope that helps
thing is thats all i can do caus i dont know any tunes but at least its original.

Not trivial in the least. There are many things that I needed to learn, do, complete....and it felt like I was being physically held back. I literally couldn't do it. I'd get so frustrated because I knew I had to, sometimes even wanted to, but couldn't.

Sometimes what I do is break it down. I will set a timer for 15 min. THAT'S ALL. And do it for that length of time.

Then I'll give myself time off.

Then, another 15 min.

I often then find that I'll go longer than the fifteen minutes. In the end I can usually force myself that way with less meltdowns.

Good luck my friend...

Seems to be one of the key areas where others struggle immensely to connect with certain aspies, and vice versa, as most people don't seem to understand why I have so much difficulty buckling down... I'm sure you both can relate to what I'm saying here though with what you've posted.

I really want to get somewhere with this band. It's my choice of career.

Thanks for your comforting words, toby2 and DevonB. I'll take them into account, and it might be easier to feel more compliant when such words come from others who can truly empathize with what this is like.