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Marylandman889
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Age: 27
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29 Sep 2013, 12:49 pm

I've always wondered if anybody else has experienced this...
When you first started a job, did you refrain from socializing? Did your peers and especially your bosses notice? What did they do? What are some of your stories when starting of with your job (or previous jobs)?



Brandon1281
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29 Sep 2013, 1:10 pm

I have always had this problem at every job. It doesn't even have to be a job, it can be any environment that I'm new to. I am very quiet and reserved with everyone at first and then I slowly open up over time. I usually start to open up when one kind person befriends me despite my shyness and often these kind people facilitate opening me up to others. I know everyone notices because they later tell me about it once I've learned them well enough to communicate with them. After I've worked somewhere for a few months, I start being able to be somewhat normal. I'm still very quiet and reserved a great deal of the time, but I'm able to emote at the moments when I need to. My bosses have definitely noticed and among the different bosses I've had I have seen two distinct reactions: either they automatically dislike me because they find my shyness suspicious, or they actually identify that I'm worth getting to know and they take care to make me feel accepted.

I am an incredibly hard worker and am extremely focused and task-oriented, so this often helps me to bridge the gap until I've had some time to "settle in." Despite my eccentricities, my coworkers usually come to appreciate me very much because I always go above and beyond the call of duty. I used to work in a fine dining restaurant and they LOVED me because my memory made me indispensable when things got rough. The restaurant had 3 levels, and about 5 different kitchen/prep areas, so things used to get shuffled about everywhere. My OCD tendencies meant that I was always neat and tidy and made sure things got put back exactly as they ought to be, and I also have an amazing memory for where I've seen things. When people were scrambling around looking for some obscure something that someone had misplaced, I could always recall where I had last seen the something in question. Even when I had not in fact seen it, I always seemed to have a much more keen eye for finding something "out of place" in any room, so I am like a savant at finding lost things. It's my own personal "superpower" I suppose, lol.



Stargazer43
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29 Sep 2013, 3:26 pm

I do the opposite: I try to socialize at every opportunity. I may not be that good at it, but at least I make an effort, and it seems to make people far more receptive to me than when I just keep to myself. A casual conversation at the water cooler about your weekends can do wonders to improve your relations with coworkers!



Cilantro
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Joined: 7 Apr 2013
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30 Sep 2013, 9:35 pm

My first job in retail was all about kissing ass and making friends with the right people. The ones who shirked their duties didn't suffer much (or at all) as long as they were fun to be around and had someone to dump their work on. I wasn't social and my company was only enjoyed by a few coworkers, so it was often me or one of the other unsocial ones who picked up their slack.

My current job values organization, productivity, problem-solving, and a varied skill pool, and while good social skills help to get the job done there's no consequence for not engaging coworkers beyond being helpful and polite. I talk if I feel like it or I'm being talked to and stay quiet if I don't. What would make my boss really angry this time around would actually be shirking my responsibilities to goof off and socialize with coworkers, and that's just how I like it.



Alexandriaprim
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12 Oct 2013, 8:23 pm

Cilantro wrote:
My first job in retail was all about kissing ass and making friends with the right people. The ones who shirked their duties didn't suffer much (or at all) as long as they were fun to be around and had someone to dump their work on. I wasn't social and my company was only enjoyed by a few coworkers, so it was often me or one of the other unsocial ones who picked up their slack.

My current job values organization, productivity, problem-solving, and a varied skill pool, and while good social skills help to get the job done there's no consequence for not engaging coworkers beyond being helpful and polite. I talk if I feel like it or I'm being talked to and stay quiet if I don't. What would make my boss really angry this time around would actually be shirking my responsibilities to goof off and socialize with coworkers, and that's just how I like it.


Sounds like you have a really good job now, I'm glad to hear it when someone is successful in their job or career. Keep up the good work! :)