what is more important: money or quality of life?

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You seem to be doing quite well - for an aspie. I don't think in terms of a long term relationship at all. (It'd be nice but I'm being realistic). Also, imagine me working in construction and listening to all these macho fools cat-calling out to women, talking about how they did this and did that last night, talking about the game last night, etc, etc. That environment would be intolerable to me. $100K/year? Hah! I wouldn't last a week.

to the OP:
all this old-timer can say, is that if i were young like you, healthy and fit, and netting $100k per annum, i'd live on $20k of it then invest the rest in income-producing equities such as REITs, lower-grade bond funds, dividend-paying stocks such as AT&T and Merck, and such. the goal would be to get a bunch of investments that earn me money just for owning 'em in the first place. some folk would invest in physical things like properties/land, but not all properties appreciate in value, they often require maintenance, and bad things could happen such as fires/floods/etc which requires costly insurance. equities at least can't burn down, and the economy would have to seriously tank [like total collapse] before you'd be totally outta luck with equities. anyways, i would try to keep this up for 10 years, at which point i'd have saved enough dough [like maybe roughly $800K minus compounded interest/dividend reinvestment] which would be enough for me to retire in some style, without leaving the relative safe harbor of conservative "cash flow" investments. ah, it takes money to make money.
once you have the money in the bag, then you can do anything you want, within reason. you could go back to school and learn to do something you truly enjoy, that would be edifying for you. you could travel. you could become a philanthropist [good deed doer]. you could invest in things that make this world a better place instead of sitting on the sidelines broke and wishing you could make a difference. all kinds of stuff would be open to you once you put this plan into action. it is much better to be still young but independently wealthy, than old and rich or even old and megarich. don't waste your youth and your limited time, make $$$$$$ ASAP which you still can, while you're still young enough to enjoy it. you can truly buy into the middle-class meme of delayed gratification, but delayed only by a decade.

For that much money, you most likely aren't going to have a life because those jobs don't pay that much for nothing. If you'd want a job where you don't have to kill yourself, you'd probably make half as much. Even 50K is pretty good compared to the average person who can barely make 30K.

At your age and income the best thing you can do is save and invest your money. In 20 years you can walk away and do whatever you want. I was very careful with my money and it paid off. When the economy collapsed and my engineering job was sent to China I had to do something else. My job now onlys pays 1/3 of what I used to make but i have no debts and can do anything I want whenever I want. My income now is primarily to supprt my son and add to what I already have saved for retirement. Nobody who make $100,000 a year has a cushy job. When you are in your mid 40's like me you will be very glad you busted your ass and saved your money.

Agree with last poster. If I was earning $100k I'd be trying to make the money work for me in the long term. Could be for example buying property and renting it out - very popular in the UK.

I guess one thing I hate about having no money is it means I can't get out and do things, and it leaves me socially isolated - which means I don't get to practice the skills I naturally find difficult. I've never had the opportunity to say "let me pay for the bill" at a restaurant or anything, because I've never had the means - and that makes me feel rather unhappy.

I feel a failure for never having managed to get a job. But I do wonder if it will be all it's cracked up to be if I ever get there, how long I might last, and whether I really would be happier.

I would say quality of life is far more important.

unfortunately, if one is to have the rudiments of a decent quality of life [a non-leaky roof over one's head and some protection from the elements/vagaries of life, that requires a fair amount of moolah to accomplish.

I try not to think of the two as separate, I instead think of them as a force which may or may not work together. You put more focus on 'money', then happiness should lower and vice versa. More focus on money to fuel your plan like you say shouldn't hurt, I'm doing the same pretty much

Money provides you with security, not happiness. I'm currently at a crossroads in my life were I have no idea what I want to do. Whatever my choice is it won't be dictated by what option pays the most. If I were to be doing something I didn't consider a grind while making just enough money to get by I would be pretty happy.

Once you get your trade ticket, could you reduce your time commitment in exchange for less pay ? I imagine that you could live on less pay and with a better quality of life you'll enjoy it more.

Balance.

May as well get your ticket.
Just because you do this work now doesn't mean you have to do it forever & retire from it.
Save your money & invest it well, as money is freedom and then when a different/better opportunity comes along you can seize it.

Also, office jobs aren't all they're cracked up to be.. long boring hours of being lazy and getting fat vs. fresh air and exercise.

I say all of this as someone with a business school education that's been doing construction stuff off and on for years. I started doing some ironwork a couple weeks ago & am enjoying it (albeit for a lot less money than if I sold my soul to go to Fort Mac.) but our project is on hold due to building permit issues. I can foresee doing this type of work for a while, but I know I'm not locked into it for a lifetime and have other career ambitions and goals I'd like to accomplish.. but I need money to get there and get those entrepreneurial plans going, so gotta do hard work along the way.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Keep doing what you're doing. There's no jobs thar are paying 100k a year besides doctors (4-8+ yrs of school).