Stress before meetings

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Hi, I was wondering how others with Aspergers handle stress building up to an event? I work as a software engineer so usually it's just sat in front of a computer and no problem. However now and then I'll need to be the focal point of a meeting talking through what I've done etc. For these I tend to get terribly stressed in the hours beforehand and that contributes to me being very nervous during the meeting itself.

As a child I'd find it difficult and stressful just talking to one person, however now as an adult (32) I'm usually ok in a group of up to 3 or 4 people. But in larger groups I find it hard to handle. I realise it's irrational but can't really control it.

Thanks for any advice, Dean

I don't know any advice, but I want to say that I have the same problem, except with job interviews. I've never gotten past that point, unless the company was desperate.

I've usually been ok in interviews as it's usually a couple of people. I usually try to tell them what I think they want to hear, and have something rehearsed in my head. It certainly gets easier when you've been through it a few times and have work experience to talk about.

Just an update on this, I had another of these meetings today when I had to do most of the talking. I had basically written a document specifying the technical design of a software feature. Again I got pretty stressed beforehand, but it was a little easier this time. Not sure if it's because I'd been through it twice before or because there were only three other people. The only issues I had in the actual meeting was trying to follow what one person was saying who was talking very fast, had to ask him to repeat a few things.

These things certainly take it out of me, feel exhausted afterwards.

guess it depends on how big the company is. Past a certain size, a 'meeting' is just a way to inform a lot of people 'how it's going to be' at the same time... you just sit back, take notes on what affects you, smile, and remember the number one enemy of progress is questions...

yeah i don't mind meetings in general, it's just stressful for me when I'm the main person who has to do the talking and lead the meeting.

I'm not sure how practical this is (probably not at all), but here's what I did to get over my fears of/problems with public speaking when I was younger:

I memorized everything I had to say, then I practiced while watching myself in a mirror. Then I imagined every possible question someone might ask; then I practiced responding to those questions (in the mirror). Yes, it was a horribly time-consuming process, but it worked! (At least for me.)