Need a job quick, any tips?

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Like the tittle says, need a job in a week or less or im homeless, anyone have tips on where to go and what to do? I am not used to this concept at all.

It would be helpful if you provided more specific information such as
what your gifts are, what you'd prefer to be doing, and other things like that.

To be honest I couldnt care less whatever it is as long as its based on hourly wage and not by how much I sell. If I get too picky I doubt I'll get anything.

I've been down and out, less than a day from being homeless, going from month to month with power/telephone cut off not fun.
I resorted to anything I could do
-donating plasma for money
-day labor
-more than one temp agency
-Get roommates

BUT.. heres the thing.
Until you focus and pick something you're really suited for you're not going to be very happy.
Jobs aren't as plentiful as they used to be.
If you apply for a job your resume needs to be re-written to be tailored for that job.
-use the same jargon
-update your resume on online job sites every day to keep it at the top
-stay positive and don't lie

If you have special skills consider forming a business (DBA at first then LLC when you can afford it) to make money doing what you're good at.

Thanks for the advice, but the story is my parents demand I get a job by next week or I am out of the house. I dont plan on being homeless and wont accept going to that low.

Not a bad situation.. you don't have to make enough to support yourself.
If you have a car I'd recommend pizza delivery.
Otherwise anything retail or food related - convenience store, restaurant,etc.
Just pick something and go all out.

-Rabbit's foot
-Horseshoe
-4-leaf clover.

Seriously, though. These days it's all about luck and/or having connections. Your best chance for getting a job quick would be fast food.

Theres always the rent boy option.

I dont understand what that is supposed to mean.

Definition of rent boy

You could sell weed!!

Actually, with that mindset you will get no job at all at the moment. I have tried myself. Just "any" job requires skills and experience these days. If I was to apply at say... a fast food joint, they would not invite me because they would rather hire someone with experience preparing fake food instead of an artist/designer/tech/teacher with no respect for authorities.

But, if I apply for a job as let's say... a teacher of graphic design... all of a sudden all my skills merged might make me the perfect person for the job.

Ok, but there are way more job openings for fast food employees then they are for teachers of design you say? True. But guess how many people "couldn't care less" what job they do, including me and you. Now compare this to how many people are great designers with teaching skills and a solid technical background.

So maybe you are good at playing games and writing code? Or maybe you have excellent gardening skills and know all about weed? Or do you like cars and painting? Maybe you even have more then two skills that you can combine into one job? I know a week is short, but I am afraid this way is the only way right now. Be creative! Think of anything you can do that others are less likely to be able to do.

Good luck!

Maybe I didnt make it clear enough, im not looking for a career, just a small entry level job. Thanks for the advice though.

Your parents sound a bit harsh... I had a similar situation with my dad not even a month and a half ago.

What I'd do is sit down with them and try to compromise. Show them that you are putting forth the effort to find a job. Make finding a job your full-time job. When the economy is still tight like it is, it can take ages to find even a single interview. It took me 3 weeks to find a job, and even then I didn't start for just over another 2 weeks because the manager is irresponsible.

If possible, put together a make-shift resume if you have any experience doing anything. For fast food, you might have luck not doing a resume as to not seem overqualified. Certainly sign up with day labour. Go door-to-door asking for applications (I usually fill the applications out before I leave). My father told me "it's a numbers game" about 782 times, so my brain hemorrhages every time I read or hear the phrase. Thing is, though, that's exactly the case at the moment.

On the up side, as well, if you get a job, many of the other places you applied to will hold onto your application and/or resume and could call you much later for an interview. This will be nice if it's better than the job you initially end up with. Just don't do what I did when Hallmark called me back and act like the interview is in the way of everything in your life. Tooootally didn't get that job. ;_;

I knew that. So, are you experienced baking burgers? ; )

Besides, would it hurt to get a job that you'd actually like?

Before looking for a job, you need to rid yourself of any feeling of desperation. Employers can smell that on you and no one would hire you. Also, the "any job will do" will turn off potential employers.
Best of luck!