How much must you make before a decent woman looks at you?

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NickfromCali
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04 Jan 2011, 11:04 pm

For a middle aged American male like me it is at least USD $100,000 a year, maybe more



sgrannel
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04 Jan 2011, 11:16 pm

I'm pretty sure the median income is a lot lower than that. What do you mean by decent? If a woman rejects you because of income, then that's just an excuse to get away from you because she isn't attracted to you and you don't want that anyway. If a woman is attracted to a man, she won't be too concerned about income and some will even endure various hardships to be with the man they're attracted to. On the other hand, no amount of money will be enough, nothing you ever do will be good enough, and issues will be contrived out of thin air just to pick a fight with you if you are with a woman who married you to pay the bills and who is not attracted to you.

I could solve most of the problems I've had with dating in the past by having more money, but then I would end up with something I don't want anyway. Therein lies the rub.


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04 Jan 2011, 11:39 pm

NickfromCali wrote:
For a middle aged American male like me it is at least USD $100,000 a year, maybe more


51 is not middle aged, and it has nothing to do with how much you make, unless she wants a family, and then more still doesn't mean you will have better success with a woman. Honestly, if you are still clinging to such misconceptions at 51, you have a lot of re-analyzing to do.



Lene
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04 Jan 2011, 11:47 pm

Define 'decent woman'



KittenWithAWhip
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05 Jan 2011, 12:14 am

Lene wrote:
Define 'decent woman'


You took the words right out of my, um, fingers.


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jamesongerbil
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05 Jan 2011, 1:20 am

Wow. Really? :?
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05 Jan 2011, 1:26 am

When I worked at a resteraunt there were plenty of guys there that had good looking girlfriends and were lifers at the resteraunt. The waitresses knew I lived with my parents and I even got hit on at least three times.


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wornlight
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05 Jan 2011, 1:36 am

i would not find a person decent whose primary concern is either my income or my appearance.



jamesongerbil
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05 Jan 2011, 1:39 am

exactly and vice versa. :roll:



chaotik_lord
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05 Jan 2011, 3:04 am

I would agree that if income is factor, it is largely shallow. That said, they may be looking for the benefit of future children. If you do not agree to children, the equation changes. If you do . . . children are very expensive.

I understand from above posters that you are 51? That does read as middle-aged to me, but at the same time, it is a highly variant age in terms of behavior.



Nan
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05 Jan 2011, 3:11 am

A "decent" woman isn't for sale, hence your income is irrelevant.



arielhawksquill
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05 Jan 2011, 3:04 pm

Since the median income for a man working full time in the US is less than $50,000, and since 95 percent of Americans have been married at least once by the age of 55, I have to say your estimate is not based on reality.



DW_a_mom
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05 Jan 2011, 4:15 pm

Todesking wrote:
When I worked at a resteraunt there were plenty of guys there that had good looking girlfriends and were lifers at the resteraunt. The waitresses knew I lived with my parents and I even got hit on at least three times.


I remember dating a very handsome waiter ;) Also a Stanford student. And a lot younger than me at the time.

Lol, I think the real point is that in that profession there simply is a lot of opportunity to meet people and interact sufficiently to develop some connection before taking the risk of asking for a date.

So, to the OP:

While I, too, am interested in your definition of a "decent woman," I think the whole money issue is pretty far down the list of attributes when it comes to generating a "first look." I looked at and even dated plenty of men with no money because they were entertaining or fun to be with, and I happened to have had enough non-threatening contact with them to know they were entertaining or fun to be with. First step is simply getting the opportunity to develop some sense of feeling connected at some level.

Now marriage ... unless a woman loves her job and makes super good money, and is into the idea of Daddy being home with any future kids, THEN earning potential comes into play. At that point, it isn't pure dollars, but lifestyle. A woman used to making decent money on her own is going to hope for a guy that will sustain the lifestyle she is used to even when she quits work to raise kids (and of course she would like to have that option). Expectations, then, will vary depending on the pool you are fishing in. Fish in a pool filled with women used to spending lots of discretionary income, and you'll be expected to make good money. Fish in a pool filled with women who know how to get by on less and don't mind doing so, then the expectations are different. Fishing around for a woman who wants you mostly for your money and not for who you are? Better be more of a multi-millionaire.


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DW_a_mom
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05 Jan 2011, 4:21 pm

arielhawksquill wrote:
Since the median income for a man working full time in the US is less than $50,000, and since 95 percent of Americans have been married at least once by the age of 55, I have to say your estimate is not based on reality.


The screen name sounds like CA. Medium income is much higher here.


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arielhawksquill
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05 Jan 2011, 5:16 pm

DW_a_mom wrote:
arielhawksquill wrote:
Since the median income for a man working full time in the US is less than $50,000, and since 95 percent of Americans have been married at least once by the age of 55, I have to say your estimate is not based on reality.


The screen name sounds like CA. Medium income is much higher here.


Really? The US Census Bureau said the median household income for California in 2008 was $61,017--higher than that national average I quoted, but not MUCH higher. Perhaps you are not aware of your privilege, if everyone you know makes more than that.



menintights
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06 Jan 2011, 12:57 am

$61,017 per person? It doesn't sound right. I would guess the average working person would earn something like $30,000/yr here.

OP probably lives in of those Republican-dominated areas though, where not even an income of $50,000/yr is considered good enough. :roll: