How do I get "common sense"??

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My manager wants to help me understand the things that are hard for me to understand, but she's not sure how, and I'm not sure how to help her help me! DX

I tried giving her an example to help her explain things to me. We work in a grooming salon, and I was struggling with controlling large, willful dogs like boxers and labs (who's parents were obviously way to busy to teach impulse control). The only "advice" I got on how to control them more effectively was to just figure it out. It's common sense.

I feel like if it's common sense, then anyone can look at what I'm doing and say, "Oh, well OBVIOUSLY what you need to do differently is this!" but that hasn't happened. It's very frustrating, and I'm starting to wonder if "common sense" is something that I lack because of my mild Asperger's.

Later, when I had figured out how to control large dogs, I explained to her that she could have told me to square my feet, keep the handle of the slip lead around my right elbow, hold the part of the slip lead near the dog's neck with my left hand, and wrap the lead behind my back so that I have my entire body anchored against the crazy, large dog. Her response? "See? You're getting it!" *facepalm!* She didn't even understand that I was asking her to put words to whatever she (and my teammates) mean by "common sense!"

Does anyone have any advice on how to open the doors of effective communication at work?

'Common Sense' is simply the ability to look at a potential action and judge what the outcome is likely to be before deciding whether or not to take that action (usually based on one's personal experiences, or observations of others in similar circumstances). Just a 'look before you leap' sort of practicality, usually so obvious that you don't even really have to consciously ponder it.

However, people will sometimes tell you that you lack common sense for not possessing knowledge from direct experience that they have already had and you have not, which is entirely unfair. What seems obvious to them may not be obvious at all to someone who has never done this before.

Common sense can be subjective, however there is usually some type of underlying logical structure. However most people can't consciously acknowledge this structure because it's innate to them.

I think in the case of handling large dogs, it's not common sense and she was just poor at training you.

A lot of times people who are bad at teaching others hide behind the "common sense" excuse.

Thanks! I think this is what she was trying to explain to me when she was saying that having no common sense isn't necessarily a bad thing. Some people just don't have it. And I have told them all about my diagnosis.
I will definitely try this stuff! Thanks, guys!

I think in this case when she told you to "use your common sense" what she really meant was "I do not know what to tell you and I do not want to think about it right now, so use trial and error". When you do not know how to perform an asignment, your supervisor HAS to give you instructions. Thats what she is there for. But I congratulate you, because you did use trial and error and found your way. You did it great!

Something I can tell you: I am NT, and for me it is a little hard to put procedures into words. I can do something, but when I need to explain someone else how to do it, sometimes I just cant. I just what I do and do not think much about it. For my Aspies it is easier to identify steps, procedures.

In my experience, "common sense" is just a shaming tactic that the uneducated like to use against the educated. It really means nothing.

Sometimes people can say "it's common sense" to be manipulative & shame you into doing something (or not doing something) that would benefit them, and only them. This may not be work-related, but to illustrate a point: I used to have a room-mate who I discerned was manipulative through his past behaviour - he tried to coax me into taking a course of action that was different than the one I wanted, when he had a vested interest in his way...he said "well, it's COMMON SENSE!!" it was really just a tool used to try and keep me ignorant. I didn't buy it. However, in the workplace where you're trying to accomplish the same goal, in this case the dog restraint, you can reasonably infer that the person isn't trying to manipulate you so you can work off that trust.

Yes...it's another layer of complexity I know...it's not just about knowing instinctively what action is common sense, but who do you trust if they tell you it's not common sense.