and i think my boss just caught me stimming...

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i usually try to only do it when no ones looking (at least when at work anyhow)

but sometimes it just happens without me consously doing it

i mean its not a extremely noticably stim ( wiggling fingers but i think she saw because i saw her expression

and im just venting now.......

Tell her, you had a dry itch between the fingers and needed handlotion.

Sorry for asking but what is stimming

Perhaps your boss thought you were nervous or had an itch. At my second job, I stim constantly (all the others who run the CNC lathes do as well - I'm beginning to think this is an Aspie job. At least a couple of the others are diagnosed), whether it be talking to my machines, watching parts being "turned" (cut) or engaging in tactile stimming (touching inserts, milling heads, turrets, tailstock, chuck, feeling the vibration from the centering machine (by leaning up against it), etc.). Nobody seems to even notice.

This isn't the case with my other job, where such behavior would get you removed (the government doesn't play by the same rules as normal entities, hence the ADA guidelines do not necessarily apply).

it probably didn't look that weird, don't worry. I think getting older I became less self-consious of little things. i might flap or dance or bounce or wiggle my fingers - i do a clappy thing and a "plotting evil genius" type 2-handed finger tappy thing and oh well. I bounce in my seat if i have a meal I like. I probably look like a giddy 3 year old. Don't care. I don't think i make the noises outside the house but the other stuff? I don't care. If someone looked at me funny or questioned it I'd say I'm excited or have a song stuck in my head (it's ok to dance to music only I hear right? right??)

If there is any terminology I could change, it would be "stimming." I just hate the sound of the word, which basically just means a physical tick, like less noticeable finger-wiggling, to more noticeable hand-flapping.

At any rate, your boss was probably just curious as to why you were doing that. Assume Occam's Razor: the simplest explanation is reasonably the most plausible.

I know that I tend toward paranoia about the reactions of others, because of frequent teasing, bullying, and harassment throughout my life. But I'm learning to let people think what they will. I've got too much I want to accomplish to waste my energy on judgmental as*holes. After 25 years of oblivion, getting to know the real me has trumped the snap-judgments of others.

Easier said than done, I know, but let her look go over your shoulder like a grain of salt you can forget about.