Frowned upon more?

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Why is an unemployed man frowned upon more compared to a women who is not working?

Where did you get this impression? I don't think I've heard that before, but it doesn't sound particularly fair or logical.

That is changing and eventually they will be frowned upon equally. People already think it's bad that I don't work.

This is probably because historically women lived with their parents until they married and then kept house and raised children and didn't work outside the home. Times have changed but some people have lagged behind and still have the mindset that women need a man to support them and that their place is to perform domestic duties in the home.

Most women I know work even if they are married or living with a man.

Social norms don't have to make sense. People feel a certain way about them, and will work hard to come up with reasons to explain why the way they feel makes sense. Even if they can't come up with an explanation, that won't necessarily change the way they feel, or what they consider to be correct.

Probably because in the past (1950s and before), women were expected not to work. The men were the working ones while the women stayed home to take care of the house and family. Despite all of our social and civil rights advancements, some of these opinions still persevere, at least subconsciously, into modern-day society.

That standard did not apply to poor people.

Exactly!

When our second child was born, my husband became the stay at home parent. We agreed when we married that we wanted one of us to be there for our child. He would not tell me that it SHOULD be me, because he wouldn't want to pidgeon-hole anyone based on gender alone. I would not tell him that it should NOT be him, because it would be critical and unfair of me to imply that I would do it 'better'.

Everyone has been fairly accepting, and I know the parent/family columnist at the local paper, who even did a profile on him because there are more men staying at home these days and she wanted to highlight that. BUT, we have some colleagues who have made disparaging remarks about it, how they couldn't live with themselves if they didn't work, or how he's slacking off because he's not at an office all day. I get pretty furious about it and tell them to go ask their wives at home if they are doing nothing or slacking off? They just don't seem to see that as equivalent, though. ~smh~

My ex was one of those. When we got together, he made more money than me, just barely. Then I finished my degree and got a big raise. He immediately started putting me down (clothes, makeup, entertainment choices, whatever), restricting my access to my friends who made me feel good about myself, constantly putting me into uncomfortable social situations... pretty much anything he could to try to prove to himself I guess that I was lucky to have him because I'm so weird or don't know things he knows, or whatever. He probably would've found other excuses to be unfaithful, too... as it was his primary excuses were 1. his parents weren't ever affectionate with each other in front of him? 2. he was overwhelmed and tired by housework (he didn't do any, but expected me to do it all and I told him exactly what I thought about cleaning up after his messy *** all the time, on top of being the one to care for our child, because he sure wasn't doing it).

Um, I digress. I think Unions do a lot of good historically, but, blame him being in one for his neanderthal mindset, they just reinforce this sense of superiority and entitlement (and, conversely, disdain for those men who don't shove themselves into that mold). I also love his Father, who is a loving parent and grandparent, but, is also a bit old-fashioned about gender expecations.

I can't help but notice you're a man. Do you feel your under more pressure to find a job?