There's nothing I actually want to do in life. No ambitions

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Bit of a background. I’m 18 and recently started studying Physics at uni, and then dropped out as a result of severely disliking most aspects of uni.

Having had some time to think about what I might want to do next, I’ve realised there really isn’t anything I want to do. I know I would want to go to uni which is why I did go, but I struggle so much socially that it really puts me off. Also from my (albeit little) experience of the academic side of it, I felt quite overwhelmed by it all. Basically, this has put me off uni completely. I thought maybe the Open Uni would be a good way to go because I’m still studying for a degree but almost fully independently so I wouldn’t have the same social issues, which would mean I could concentrate on the course content and be more confident with it. However I wonder to myself do I really want to spend the next few years of my life studying, when there’s nothing I really want to do in life.

Finding it difficult to fit in socially puts me off anything that involves new people really. It’s so bad that I don’t even answer the phone if I don’t know who is calling, so going into something where there’s lots of new people - in person - is daunting for me. I’ve tried to find something I could do where I didn’t have to face that (which is why I thought of the Open Uni) as I thought having experience in something where there isn’t any new people would be useful, as trying to adapt to something new as well as having to fit in with new people feels like way too much for me. I thought maybe if I became confident at something, then having new people introduced to it later on would be less of a dramatic change for me so I would find it easier. However there’s nothing that I want to do, even without the prospect of having to fit in with so many new people.

I’ve looked through job listings and never have I found anything where I have thought I would want to do that. I’ve even tried imagining each one as if it was only me doing the job with nobody else around – so I’m only considering whether I would want to do the job and not whether the idea of new people is putting me off – but I still haven’t found anything that I would want to do. I’ve done the same thing with apprenticeships and still nothing.

I’ve found that I don’t really get any pleasure out of anything, and I don’t really have passion for anything, or even any interests or hobbies really. I like playing video games but I even get bored of them quite easily, compared to when I was much younger and I could play something for hours on end, even if it was repetitive. I can’t set my mind to something and stick with it. Lots of times I’ve thought I’ll start working out again because it’s good for me, but every time I’ve just stopped out of a lack of motivation. Even if I try and make it part of my routine, well I don’t really have a routine but I tried to basically schedule it into my life instead of thinking ‘do I feel like doing it’, but still I just end up quitting. As I took Computing at A-Level I have a bit of experience in programming and the other day I got the idea to test my skills and try and code my own small game, and even though I was making progress through it I still just got bored and stopped. It's not as if I got completely stuck and thought I'll leave it for now. I even get fed up of looking up things I could possibly do.

I know it doesn’t mean my life is over, and I’m still young anyway, but a lot of the time I just feel like there isn’t anything for me to do, and it makes me feel pretty hopeless. I’m just different to other people in the sense that a lot of people will be throwing applications in to every retail store possible because they want to work, but I can’t see myself doing something like that. I know I’m not meant to expect to ‘enjoy’ the work etc but I feel like I would be so fed up and just not want to be there

I don’t know what I can do really

18 years is a very young age to get into University. You should only do it when you're ready, and it's definetely OK to wait. Barack Obama, for one, was kind of old when he entered law school.

Having no passions or hobbies is actually normal for a guy your age. When you're a teenager, you sometimes get bored or feel depressed. It's OK to feel this way. When I was young I had the same troubles as you did, but growing up was a great thing for me - I moved away from home, into a bigger city with more people and met some great people and made friends. I also found a real passion, that send me into university, where I ended up gradudating in library and information science. It lead me to a lot of different jobs, and while I have faced discrimination as an aspie, I have also been able to use the positive sides of my autism into solving problems and being very thorough in my daily job.

You're in a vacuum right now, and it's OK. I suppose you could try and get a day job. Maybe some sort of temp work would be good for you - that means you only stay at the workplace for a short time, and you can leave it if it doesn't fit you.