I quit my job yesterday

Post Reply New Topic

I quit my cleaning job yesterday after my boss upset me. I’d already been upset by my partner the previous day and that morning so when I got to work I couldn’t focus on the job, could only go over in my head the arguments we’d had and try to work out how to resolve them. I wasn’t feeling well so told the boss I’m sorry I needed to go home, was not up to working that day. She was very unsympathetic even though she’s aware I have ASD. She told me to grow up and learn responsibility and that she cannot have me bringing my problems to work. I replied that I would not as I wasn’t coming back to work.

So that is it, I have no job and worrying about this because we cannot pay the bills without me working, even if I claim benefits it’s not enough. At the time I quit though I wasn’t thinking about this. I felt so overwhelmed being in that house cleaning. I quit my job as an accounts assistant to go cleaning peoples houses because in the accounts job I couldn’t handle being around my boss who constantly got angry with me and caused me anxiety. I thought I was good at the cleaning until last week when a woman complained that her kitchen and bathroom were filthy after I cleaned them. I spent 4 hours cleaning her entire house but because she refused to pay the boss said I won’t get paid for that job. I also found out that some clients have said to my boss that I’m a bit slow. That’s because I try to be thorough. All this has been a worry for me ever since and yesterday the boss and I cleaned the same house. I think I got overwhelmed by lots of things at once and just panicked and had to get out of there. Now I don’t know what to do and don’t think cleaning is the job for me because of what’s happened and also I’m middle aged and overweight so how can I compete speedwise with the other cleaners who are much younger I can’t go back to office work because there is almost always someone there who causes me anxiety and too much multitasking involved. I’ll continue to apply for factory jobs but none of these ever reply to me. Also I cannot handle more than 30 hours per week so my options are very limited

The following are the texts from my boss and my replies:

But you said you've given it to someone else so how is that my fault?

I won't be, I'm not coming to work anymore. Too much stress in all areas of my life, I need to spend some time alone. Sorry for causing you problems. Please let me know when is convenient to collect the £41 you owe me.

I'm not well enough to work

That's not your problem

Please just leave me alone, I have my own issues to deal with and you are causing me anxiety. I won't be replying again today.


My partner said my replies prompt an angry response I want to reply to her last text that I won't be returning anything until I get my £41 but he says I need to call her not text. I'm so scared of the phone though for conversations like this, I cannot bring myself to do it. I need to get my £41 though Can anyone please advise.

Hi Elsa,

I'm sorry you lost your job under those circumstances.

I don't know you--so I won't judge you.

But it's really true: one has to try not to let one's personal problems affect one's work. I think you know this, though; you seem like an intelligent person.

Depending on how long you've been on the job, you might not have to include it on a CV.

If I were you, I would try to search for a new job right away. Being jobless could become a bad habit.

It's really difficult when you cannot pay the bills; it causes much stress.

At least, in the UK, you have somewhat of a "safety net." We, in the US, have less of one.

I wish you luck in your future job search.

I don't know if those responses of yours were ever sent, but I don't think it matters. What I mean is, your boss sounds like a bully in those quotes. Like a scary person it would be unhealthy to be around. Like potentially physically threatening. The tone is downright disturbing. You're better off working somewhere else, and probably doing something else as well.

What are you interested in? What is your education in? Are you a certified lifeguard or anything?

Everything I posted there was exchanged in text and worse came after that. She accused me of stealing a clients house key and threatened to go to the police if I didn't return it immediately, asked me if I was on drugs when I tried to arrange for her to collect from me, insinuated that I don't love my kids and wrote slanderous comments about my partner. He is dealing with this now and says she owes me more money for petrol and travel time because without that I was earning less than minimum wage. He will take this to small claims court if she doesn't pay.

For now I'm taking a break from work as I've been signed off by the GP for anxiety. I do feel I need some time to gather my thoughts and decided what I want to do next. Unfortunately I don't have any decent qualifications but may be able to get a job as an animal care assistant due to past experience. That's all I feel cable of doing right now as other recent jobs have caused me massive anxiety so I don't want to go back to cleaning or office work

If you love animals and have experience handling dogs and cats, you could become your own boss as a pet-sitter when people go away on holidays. You will have no boss and no coworkers. Your clients will be out of town and you will be able to work completely alone. The only time you need to talk to your clients is when they schedule you and again when they come back. The reason I'm saying this is I find pet-sitters are always completely booked whenever I try to go on holidays. And you're paid ahead of time mostly in cash. Maybe it's not such a bad idea.

I'm glad he's handling it, and I think Molly has a good idea. Even when you can find a pet sitter,it's hard to be sure you can trust them with the key to your home, let alone your dog.

I don't know how it really is. There is the difference between trying to cope and pitying oneself while constantly nagging about their problems (a reason why I hated my last job, since I worked in an office full of drama queens). If your boss got angry at you because you constantly were talking about your problems, it is different than pissing people off because of daily anxiety attacks because of the tiniest things. Have you tried compromising or sharing ideas how to avoid anxiety or did you expect your boss to do that for you?

I had run-ins with my boss because I didn't let him talk down on me, was honest to him (I told him once that he was a disappointment of a manager and I would love to take his job to get the company out of the red for the sake of my colleagues) and because he blamed other people for HIS mistakes. When he left, I didn't get the job and his successor was just a failure as he was. In the end, I had constant anxiety attacks, because no one considered my idea to move me into another office where I didn't have to listen to a fat pig of a colleague who only held self obsessed conversations and couldn't moderate her damn talking volume. It pissed me off enough to make me yell at her. Luckily a month after, I didn't have to quit or get myself fired because my contract expired entitling me to welfare.

Now if you tried to make a change to cope with your workplace, then I may applaud you. However if you deliberately complained and pissed people off, blaming AS, just to quit, then I will be shaking my head.

I've been a cleaner just like the OP and I feel sure she wasn't merely complaining and blaming ASD for her work difficulties. I feel sure that just like me, she stuck to it as long as she could while having more and more severe anxiety, until her anxiety finally broke her down and she couldn't help but quit. My experiences as a cleaner pretty much exactly mirrored what the OP described.

I was talking in reference to her accounts assistant job.

That's a good idea but not an option for me unfortunately due to my partners allergies

Anniihya there was only one person I had an issue with in the accounts job. I certainly wasn't moaning constantly or pissing people off as I sat at my desk quietly most of the time. My boss was an absolute nightmare and a bully. I posted about it in the disclosing AS at work thread.