why is my co worker ignoring me when i say hi...............

Page 1 of 1 [ 4 posts ] 

Barnes66
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 13 Mar 2015
Posts: 25
Location: Alberta

01 May 2015, 8:48 am

A year ago I pointed that this co worker had put on so much weight in front of other 2 workers.I don't know why I said that as I just say whats on my mind.I wasn't trying to be hurtful. This type of comments are common in my culture. I didn't think much of it until she told me that she was very hurt by it. I apologized and she seemed fine around me afterwards but she wasn't as friendly and warm before the incident .She will respond whenever I say hi to her


Now months later,i say hi to her whenever I see her but she now ignores me and avoids me.whats the deal



SocOfAutism
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 2 Mar 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,552

01 May 2015, 1:18 pm

What you said was the equivalent of punching someone in the face. A simple apology is not sufficient to make up for it. I'm sorry to make that analogy, but I grew up with a person who struggled with his weight and I believe that's how he felt when people commented on it.

If you really want to rebuild your relationship with this person, you should tell her that you have problems communicating and really didn't understand how hurtful your comment was. You could give an example of another time that you made a mistake like this. Then ask if she could consider giving you another chance, because her friendship is important to you.

Even then she might not be able to get over it, and she would be entitled to feel that way.



justkillingtime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,722
Location: Washington, D.C.

01 May 2015, 3:12 pm

A few years ago, I turned a corner in the hall and heard a co-worker telling a group of people how weird I was. I never got over it.


_________________
Impermanence.


slenkar
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Apr 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,146
Location: here

01 May 2015, 6:25 pm

You apologized and she accepted it....but then decided to shun you some more...

If I make mistakes I expect to be given second and third chances, so I do the same for others.

You dont want to change jobs , and getting her in trouble wont solve anything.

I guess you just have to persist and break down the barriers.

If you were shunning her you would probably get in trouble, but life isn't fair unfortunately.