Corporate language

Post Reply New Topic

Does anyone know of a reference document that translates the meaning of catch phrases and corporate douchebag terminology? I'm having trouble understanding my coworkers because they use a language I am unfamiliar with.

Just curious...what is your job?

here you go

http://dilbert.com

Start compiling your own list for future reference? I had to do that once. Unfortunately, every workplace has its own jargon, and the bigger the organization, the crazier it gets.

I work in missile defense/launch vehicle testing and analysis. I've started my own list, but right now it's just a list of phrases I don't understand. Trying to figure them out myself has been impossible. This is my greatest weakness. I am confused very often. I understand phrases like "low-hanging fruit" and "hit the ground running" because I read articles in Forbes that list the most hated buzzwords of the year. Sometimes I wonder if people are just making up phrases as they go. None of it seems to be industry-specific. I also don't understand acronyms, which are used entirely too often in government contracting jobs. I flip through my list of acronyms while people are talking, but I still can't keep up. Add to that these mystery phrases without context, and it's a computational burden. I feel really stupid. I've Googled the crap out of "taking an action" and I still don't know what it means in the context of requirements verification. Why can't people just use words whose definitions have the meaning they want to express?

i use urbandictionary.com and acronymfinder.com all the time. although most of the time i simply google 'define <whatever>'. the most relevant entry (including from those websites) is usually the first one

also googling images instead of regular plain-text web results can help sometimes

because they're afraid they might not sound fancy enough. and it's not just an empty fear. in the corporate or bureaucratic world, "not-very-smart" people above you in the chain of command usually can't tell the difference between actually complex things and pure smoke-and-mirrors masked by fancy wording. the end result is everybody is forced to use fancy wording. if your boss thinks he can do your job (because he can understand what you say), he'll be more likely to think you're expendable. and it's a way to keep people who might be better at the job from competing with you

not that it's something actually new. if you think about it, what was ancient magic (and magic words) after all, right? probably just people making their trade and their role seem more complicated than it was