need some help

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Hi I have issues keeping jobs mainly down to my AS, my other problem is I am a website builder and have stayed with html/css for over 13yrs now, within the technology field especially my area it has been extremely difficult to find a different job.

An additional issue is I used to love design but with people including my family telling me i cannot do something for 27 yrs (im now 27), it makes you lose self esteem and determination in something which you used to love doing. I have stayed within the IT sector for 5 yrs doing it at college and uni, after uni and gaining my degree i went back to building websites not falling back on my degree and as a result forgot most of my degree, i did this as i believed i would find my way, now i just don't know and my job track record hasn't been good or has been very unlucky, i worked in a college where i thought i had found my feet but that was only a contract and that ended unfortunately due to today's climate.

After my contract ended I couldn't find a job for 6 months, although i have now got one i have been hit by major depression due to my closest relatives suicide (of which I was one day late), a close friend of mine died years ago, i had been in the same city as them 1 day prior to their death, and then another close relatives death from cancer and finally my dads parkinsons getting worse, my financial situation wasn't good as the jobs i previously had were all poor pay, lets just say i can't be in this prediciment again. I am terrible at Maths and have epilepsy (petit mal) so can't do 2 fulltime jobs just to support myself as I can't cope with too much stress at once. I cannot afford to go back to school/college.

The job I have now is the only one where I have the chance to learn which is fantastic but i can't shake my depression or lack of drive thus not being able to learn like i should. When I was searching for work I was told I was over qualified or my skills didn't meet their requirements, I honestly don't know what job I would like to do as I have done web for so long. I feel I have to get out of web quickly though.

Sorry I forgot to mention, I have been fired, made redundant, contract ended so am in my 4th job now which isn't going well.

I'm sorry for your loss.

So you have a job right now, yes? Are you doing what you can to focus on keeping this job? It doesn't sound like you can afford to lose another one, either financially or emotionally. Is your current employment something that might eventually evolve into something better for you?

Hi blastoff
I am trying to study for it none of the stuff is going in so im getting impatient, yes if i learn javascript and then c sharp it can lead onto something better, the truth is i don't know if i want to be a programmer and hope i would just find my way, i was lead down the programming route years ago by my brother as i used to love design he told me i couldn't do design for a long time so in the end i thought try programming and thats not working out, the job i have now is programming based, my cv is web design based so when i look for work they tend to say hes a web developer and think i can't do the work, because of depression and lack of drive i can't seem to find the will to pick up a book to read it and my family arn't helping that much.